Brothers in Arms
by Scully2
Summary: Set immediately after Common Ground in Season 3. Sheppard struggles to deal with the aftermath of the events in the episode Common Ground, and decides to take matters into his own hands. Spoilers up to the latter half of S3.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I promise that once i've finished playing with them, i'll put them back in their original condition. Alas I don't own it, but I love it.

Reviews: Love them! The good, the bad and the ugly!

Rating: K+

Spoilers up to Season 3. This will be an AU fic due to events in the latter part of S3

* * *

**BROTHERS IN ARMS**

Chapter 1 

**"_The finest kind of friendship is between people who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it__"_**

Heading off into space, the jumper vibrated slightly. Not that everyone could sense it. Sheppard believed he could feel the motions because of the gene he possessed. He looked up from the base of the ship to see if anyone else had noticed, but they hadn't. It seemed, to John anyway that all their focus was on him. It wasn't surprising given just what had happened, but still, it made him uneasy – all that attention on him was making him nervous.

So far, he'd been able to keep it together, but he wondered for how long. One thing was certain, as he looked across towards the other side of the ship towards the Wraith slumped unconscious, it would soon be over - maybe. As the ship descended towards the planet, John wasn't sure what he planned to say, but he knew that he had to say something. This man…Wraith…thing, hell, he didn't even know how to describe him now, was, in a sense just like him - his 'Brother in Arms' so to speak. A prisoner of Kolya; tortured, abused and kept against his will in a cold and barren environment, with little chance of escape. The act of inhumanity that had possessed Kolya had even surprised him, and he wondered how many other people had suffered at Kolya's hands, and as a consequence the Wraiths. How many people had died? Did the Wraith save them, as he had ultimately done with him? Or had fate decreed that he be the only one to survive the nightmare. In truth, he didn't know. In reality he couldn't even think about that right now. So he did the only thing he could; push the thought to the very furthest and darkest part of his mind, and lock it away. Trouble was, now the Wraith wasn't just a nameless enemy anymore. Things had changed on the planet, and in the jail cell. Things he doubted he would ever be able to explain to any of his team, or even fully understand himself.

As the jumper landed smoothly, John smiled inwardly at Rodney's ever improving flying skills. Privately he thought there were a few changes since his capture, even though he knew instinctively he hadn't been gone that long. But, certain things felt different. Then again, maybe it wasn't them. Maybe it was him who was different? Either way, it was soon to be over, at least that's what he kept telling himself over and over since his rescue.

His team had been uncharacteristically quiet since they'd seen the transformation, but none more so than Rodney, who continued to mutter incoherently under his breath. Beckett though as always, fussed. John assumed that there was a fine print into the Doc's personal Hippocratic Oath that he took when he became a doctor. The whole, 'I will do no harm', was as always to be maintained, followed by what must be Beckett's personal addendum of 'always disregard what your patients say, particularly in the case of Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard'. He'd always maintained that he was fine in the past, even when his own blood was dripping off his forearm. At the time, the Doc's concerns for him had always been warranted, and no doubt this was a time where it was also justified. Nevertheless, he didn't want it. He just wanted things back to normal, if that was at all remotely possible.

Ronon, rising from his seat walked towards the unconscious shackled prisoner, his weapon aimed directly at him. John saw ain intensity in the man's eyes - a look of pure hatred. Burning like an open campfire; his face contorted with anger at the thought of a Wraith sitting before him. So far he'd been able to keep his temper under wraps, but not any more. The whirring sound of the weapon charged as Ronon's finger clasped the trigger.

"No!" John shouted directly at Ronon and almost too loudly. He watched as Ronon turned to look directly at him. A thousand questions burned in his friend's hatred filled eyes; he didn't understand. If truth were told, he didn't know if any of them would after this, but it wasn't up to them.

"He deserves it!" The statement spat from Ronon's lips, and his brow furrowed. He couldn't understand after everything his friend had gone through, why he was allowing this 'thing' to live. The number of people they had slaughtered and fed on; women - innocent children who had lost their lives at their kinds hands, maybe even his. But it wasn't just that, this animal had fed on Sheppard over and over again. Seeing how his friend had suffered repeatedly enraged him, yet Sheppard was letting him go. None of it made sense.

"I made a deal!" John shouted, defending what appeared to them to be an unjustifiable act. Even if the Wraith had given him back his life, his friends would never be able to understand or forgive the Wraith for all the pain it had caused him up to that point.

"Yes, and we know just how great they are at keeping to their end of the bargain, don't we?" Rodney protested. "You do remember what happened the last time we made a deal, don't you? Betrayal. Near death. Trapped in a cocoon, weapons flying overhead," Rodney gesticulated with his hands flying, in essence to show just how ridiculous his friend was being. "The whole 'I'm going to feed on you' scenario…"

That was the point where he snapped. "Don't go there Rodney." It was a warning to his friend to back off; he didn't think he could cope with McKay just now on top of everything else. He knew only too well the consequences of what could happen here on the planet surrounded by Wraith darts flying overhead. The last thing he wanted was the team to fall apart while they were in potential mortal danger by landing - albeit cloaked, on a Wraith infested planet. But, he had to repay the debt, it was important to him. And who knew, this one act of trust might not make a difference in the grand scheme of things, but like it or not, he owed the Wraith, at least in some nonsensical way. Simply he told them, "I have my reasons." John watched each of them carefully for some kind of response. Teyla looked away slightly, knowing that Rodney had not surprisingly, hit a raw nerve. Beckett, refused to look at anyone but Rodney, silently pleading with him to just get 'this' over and done with so that they could all head back to Atlantis. Ronon lowered his weapon as a gesture to his friend. Rodney though, not usually offended by arguments appeared hurt by John's words and turned his back on his friend, walking towards the cockpit, without so much as a backward glance. The SF's new better than to countermand their superiors' orders and simply nodded. "Good. Now that that's settled, someone give me a hand to get him out of the jumper."

As they lowered their still unconscious prisoner to the ground, John ushered his comrades back into the jumper. After slight protesting from Ronon, they agreed once more to abide to his request, still not understanding why Sheppard was behaving so humanely towards the Wraith; particularly given what they had witnessed in the control room.

Instinctively John surveyed his surroundings, noting that the only real source of light emanated from the Stargate as it shimmered brightly in the distance. But he wasn't prepared to take any chances. Keeping his eyes peeled for any signs of enemy activity, he waited alone outside the jumper. In the cold night air he exhaled slowly watching his breath slowly evaporate in the darkness.

He shivered.

He wasn't sure if it was the drop in temperature or the fact that the adrenaline in his body was beginning to dissipate, but he ignored it anyway. For the next few minutes he waited patiently for the Wraith to stir - his weapon twitching restlessly against his thigh, waiting for something. Truth be told, he didn't know what to expect. Now that they were free, would things be different between them? He remembered back to his conversation with the Wraith on the planet as they fled for their lives, each making clear what would happen when each of them returned home. The answer echoed in his ears, 'all bets are off'. He reminded himself that it had to be this way, there was no way he could ever be a friend with a Wraith – it was absurd, wasn't it?

Inside the jumper his team watched cautiously, ready to take on the Wraith prisoner if need be. The tension in the jumper was becoming unbearable, lifted only slightly by Teyla speaking softly to Doctor Beckett. Not wanting the Colonel to hear her concerns she asked, "Do you think he is alright?" They all knew that the words held several meanings.

Carson looked at her, his shoulders shrugging in response to a question he didn't have the faintest clue of how to answer. "In all honesty, I don't know. There's so much we don't know about the feeding process. Have you ever seen this before?" he questioned her, hoping that she would have an answer for him. But, recalling the surprised expression on her face when they had realised what the Wraith had done in restoring the colonel to health, he didn't expect it.

Teyla shook her head as she tried to bring to mind a memory or a rumour about the Wraiths still unknown abilities. As far as she was concerned, this was incomprehensible. In all the years that she had watched family, friends and neighbours culled, never had she heard of such an intervention. The only response she could utter was, "Never."

Ronon clenched his fists in frustration. His voice edged with anger echoed in the stillness of the night, "He should've let me kill that thing on sight."

"Ronon! Lower your voice." Teyla admonished, warning him that the colonel would be able to hear him outside. "Look, I know you are upset, we all are. But shouting is not going to solve anything."

"No, but killing him would!" Ronon countered angrily pointing to the supine figure lying on the dusty ground.

"That is not our decision. The colonel has the right to deal with the Wraith as he sees fit. It is not for us to question his actions," she continued trying to reason with him, but knew full well it was a futile gesture. Ronon's feelings surrounding the Wraith were evident to everyone, never more so than recently when he was forced to become their runner once more. The emotions surrounding that event were still clearly in the forefront of his mind, and although she understood his animosity towards the Wraith, he needed to be reminded that it wasn't up to him to decide on the best course of action, not this time.

"Isn't it?" An uncharacteristically quite voice stated softly from the front of the jumper. Rodney's head lowered slowly to the ground as if unsure where to look. As the group turned to look at him, Rodney continued with caution. "Look, all I'm saying is we don't know what happened when he was – well, you know what I mean," he finished hesitantly. Before deciding that he hadn't finished what he wanted to say, he continued, "What if something happened to his brain? What if the Wraith is doing some mind control thing on him like they did with Teyla a few years ago?"

"Look, lets not get ahead of ourselves shall we? Once the colonel has done what he needs to do, and I get him back to the medical bay, then we'll know more. There's no point in jumping to conclusions before we have all the facts," Carson tried reassuring them, and hoped that in the process he could reassure himself. This was way out of his level of understanding, even with all the research he'd done on Wraith physiology. Problem was, all those that had suffered at the hands of the Wraith had either died painfully or had lost their minds. And that was a certainty. Like all of them sat before him, he didn't have the answers and in truth he wasn't sure if he ever would. But, what he did know was, there was a young man standing afore him, that was going to need him, whether he realised it or not.

Outside, John waited patiently before he glimpsed a small movement on the ground that caught his vision. Within seconds a long drawn out growl echoed in the stillness of the night as the Wraith became aware of his surroundings. Instinctively and partly out of fear of the unknown, John raised his weapon towards the man on the ground. Unexpectedly though, the Wraith appeared to relax slightly at the vision before him, and John wondered what was going on in the Wraith's mind. Due to the unnatural situation that they had both been placed in by Kolya, was it possible that they had built up more than just a necessary alliance?

"Ah, Sheppard." The Wraith growled huskily, his voice reverberating in the quiet night air. Checking to his believed injuries, he patted himself down. It surprised him to find that he had sustained no further injuries other than those that had been inflicted on him at the hands of the Genii soldiers. "I thought you…" he continued rising quickly, before standing face to face with his companion.

Sheppard, lowering his weapon, and with an unspoken understanding that the Wraith would not hurt him interjected, "There's a lot you don't know about humans." His face was stoic, no trace of fear or hatred for the creature that stood before him.

"Ah, I see." The Wraith nodded in comprehension while stealing a look at his surroundings. For a brief moment in time the only sound that could be heard was the gentle flickering of the event horizon emanating from within the Stargate. The silence ensued for a few moments more as each of them watched the other - neither one of them sure what to say. The Wraith, looking directly into Sheppard's eyes broke their silent reverie, telling him, "Next time we meet…"

Remaining stoic in his stance, he looked deeply into the eyes of the man that had almost killed him before restoring his life. And without even blinking, John replied honestly, "All bets are off." Inwardly though, he didn't know if he could honour that agreement. And his sense was, coming from the man that stood directly in front of him, that he couldn't either. Ultimately though this was how it had to be. A niggling doubt crept into his thoughts – does it really have to be this way?

A dart flew overhead, and the Wraith looked up into the twinkling stars of the night sky, watching as the craft whizzed past their location; relief washed over him. After what seemed like an eternity, was now not just a hopeless dream that he'd longed for in the dark, dank prison; it was finally a reality. He was going home. When he turned back, Sheppard was gone. The only sensation that remained was from the gust of wind that crossed his face as the cloaked puddle jumper flew into the air. "Next time we meet…" The Wraith stated aloud, his sentence left unfinished.

Teyla was the first to greet him inside the jumper as she watched the unusual exchange that had just taken place. "Ready?" her voice questioned as Sheppard continued to stare at the standing figure. Turning to finally face her, he saw a depth of understanding at what he had achieved behind her caring chocolate brown eyes. A simple nod was enough to convey that he was ready, and she laid a gentle hand on the back of his shoulder, directing him to a seat where the others continued to watch his actions. No other words were necessary at the moment.

Sheppard knew what they were thinking as he played with his thumbs. If he were in their place, he would be wondering the same thing. Irrespective of his reasons behind doing what he did, he couldn't shake the feeling that something important had taken place during the last…however long it had been since his incarceration.

"We've contacted Atlantis, and let everyone know you're okay," Carson assured him, carefully placing his words. "I'll need you to come to the infirmary for a check up, but I'll try not to keep you too long."

"Doc…" John started, but never got finished.

"Aye, I know. You're fine, there's nothing to worry about, there's nothing wrong with you. But, you forget that I've seen and heard it all before. Look, colonel, we don't know what the effects of this will be. And I don't want a repetition of the you know what." Carson ended cryptically.

Sheppard looked at him quizzically, not knowing what the 'you know what' actually was. "What?"

"The thing you told me never to mention again?" Carson replied elusively, trying to psychically pass the information on without actually sayings the words.

"What?" He still didn't have the faintest clue what Carson was referring to, or maybe he was just too tired to care.

"Bug Man," Rodney supplied helpfully, not meeting his friend's gaze.

"Oh! That," John nodded finally comprehending what he meant. Shaking off the image from his last bout with the Wraith, he scrunched his face at the memory, "I thought we weren't going to mention that again, Rodney."

"But you…you…oh never mind" Rodney stuttered back at him exasperated, before ultimately deciding that it wasn't a good day, and closed his eyes in defeat. In doing so, though, he'd missed the slight smile from his friend to show that there were no hard feelings.

That small gesture he hoped was enough, for now at least, to convince everyone that he was okay, and he hadn't suffered any mild altering effects at the hand of the Wraith or Kolya. Looking towards Teyla, he saw a hint of a smile playing in her eyes, while Carson rolled his in desperation. Ronon and Rodney, he thought might need a bit more convincing though. John knew it would only be a matter of time and that their feelings were brought on by concern, and he appreciated it. He just wasn't any good at conveying it.

End of part 1


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"_Time heals all wounds."_

As they entered the jumper bay, the medical team were on standby with a gurney at their side. Carson's cryptic message over the radio earlier indicated that there didn't appear to be any serious injuries to their patient, but he didn't want to take any chances. Recalling the events of previous missions and the pen chance for the colonel and his team getting into difficulty off world, the medical technicians were fully aware that anything was possibility. As the jumper landed smoothly, they waited to transport their usually uncooperative patient to the infirmary. On hearing the heated exchange coming from the back of the jumper, they realised they were going to have a battle on their hands getting their patient on a gurney.

Sheppard waved his arms dismissively towards Beckett in an effort to stave off the persistent doctor, and failing miserably. "I don't care what you say, Doc. I'm not getting on that thing. I'm perfectly capable of walking to the infirmary."

"Just get on the damn trolley will you," Rodney said a little too harshly for his own ears.

"No, I won't," Sheppard retorted matching his tone as they walked down the ramp. "I'm fine. I have not been shot or stunned. My appendages are all there, I am not bleeding…"

Clearing his throat McKay pointed to the feeding mark that was still on his chest. In response, Sheppard zipped up his sweater. One thing was for sure; he didn't want everyone gawping at the bloodied feeding mark unless it was absolutely necessary. He didn't know why it affected him so much, it just did. As he turned to walk out of the jumper bay, he came face to face with Doctor Weir.

Elizabeth's breath caught in her throat. Carson had told her that Colonel Sheppard appeared okay, but to see him back to normal, so to speak, caught her completely off guard. "Colonel. Glad to see you back." Doctor Weir said more calmly than she felt. "You look…"

"Fine, I know."

"I was going to say different," Elizabeth elaborated with a hint of uncertainty, her thoughts tumbling to the forefront of her mind at the unexpected end result of his capture. "The last time I saw you…" she finished, unable to continue her sentence. Her eyes suddenly found the ground extremely interesting, while John remained silent. Finding her voice again, she focused this time on Carson, "How is he?"

At this point, Sheppard was becoming incensed, "Isn't anyone listening? I said I'm fine. Look can we just get this over and done with, please? It's been a long day, and believe it or not I'm tired." As Carson was about to interrupt, John finished, "And no, it hasn't got to do with what happened. You'd be tired to if you had been running round the forest all night. So, I'll tell you what, you finish off having your 'little chat' about my apparent state of ill health and I'll meet you in the infirmary. Okay? Good." John finished abruptly without letting anyone else get a word in edgeways.

Ultimately, Carson didn't have much choice but to allow him to walk to the infirmary, even if it was against his better judgement. It was either that, sedate him or strap him down on the gurney. From what they had witnessed earlier and now in the jumper bay, he doubted that putting the colonel under sedation would help matters; in all likelihood it was more likely to compound the situation. Given the stress that his patient had endured over the last few days, the last thing he wanted to do was cause more problems for him.

* * *

"How are you feeling?" 

"I'm fine. If there was anything seriously wrong I'd tell you." Sheppard told Carson, a hint of frustration resounding in his normally relaxed demeanour. Slumping his head back against the pillow he brushed his hands through his hair. "What do I have to do or say to convince you that there's nothing wrong with me?"

Carson planted his hands on his hips, as if daring the young pilot to win this argument. "You'll forgive me if I don't take your word for it? I've seen you come in here with cracked ribs, concussion and a bruised spleen after a Wraith attack, and you've told me you were fine."

"I _was_ fine."

Shaking his head, he knew it was futile arguing with him. At the end of the day, he wasn't letting him go until he was satisfied that everything was, as it should be. "That's precisely why I'm not letting you out of the infirmary. You can go when I've done all the checks I need to and not before, do I make myself clear?"

"Fine, but it doesn't mean I have to like it." A fleeting thought went through his mind, and he wondered if McKay was up to breaking him out.

"I'm serious, colonel."

_Damn!_ The doc was getting too good at reading him, "I know." He looked up to see Carson giving him 'the look' that told him there was no chance of leaving here without his authorisation. He felt like a kid who'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Knowing he was in a no win situation he sighed in frustration, it was going to be a long 24 hours.

* * *

"I don't like to say I told you so, Doc, but…." Sheppard smiled at him triumphantly, taking off the blood pressure cuff for the last time…he hoped. After what seemed like an eternity, when in reality it had only been a few days, Sheppard had reached his upper limit of being prodded, poked and jabbed. 

"Well, physically I can't find any sign of trauma, apart from the feeding mark, which I'm sure will clear in a week or so, I hope. That and a slight elevation in your blood pressure seem to be the only medical problems I can find, but…" He stroked the stubble on his chin, his lower lip tightening at the feeling that he was missing something. But he'd run all the scans that he could, and then some; each test result had come back normal. It was a mystery. And the one thing Carson hated the most, was a mystery. Not only that, there was still the question over whether this had affected him psychologically. To go through that kind of torture and still function with his daily duties was not something in his area of expertise.

"Doc, trust me, there is nothing left for you to probe." Knowing full well that the most intimate parts of his anatomy had been on display to the whole of the medical team at one time or another, he wasn't in a hurry to have that repeated.

"I know. Like I said, medically you seem reasonably healthy, considering the trauma that your body's sustained over the last few days, and all your blood tests seem relatively normal. I just want to make sure given your previous encounter with Ellia and now…"

"You know, for someone who agreed not to mention that again, there's sure been a whole lot of 'mentioning'." Frowning at the thought, he tried to think positively, but as the hours had turned into days, his patience was wearing thin. His brief stay in the infirmary had not been as brief as he anticipated once Carson had gotten a hold of him. He knew the Doc was just being thorough, but he just wanted to get back to normality, something he'd experienced little of recently. "So, can I get back to duty now?" John asked impatiently. Over the last few days, everyone had come to see him, Elizabeth, Ronon, Teyla, even Rodney who still seemed a bit distant. But after the first day, other people on the base began arriving, partly to see if the old rumour mill was true, but mostly he thought they came out of morbid curiosity. He was beginning to feel as if he was taking part in a freak show, and he was the freak.

Doctor Beckett exhaled slowly, stalling for time before he broached the subject to his continually uncooperative patient. Closing the curtains around his bed, he pondered briefly on what to say. "Not just yet. There's someone I want you to talk to first."

He had a feeling the Doc would bring this up. It was to be expected, especially given the circumstances, but it didn't mean he had to like it. He really didn't feel as if he had that many issues to work out. And the only issue he did have, was with Kolya, and that was something he planned to correct just as soon as he got out of there. "Doc, I don't need to see her."

"That may well be, but I can't release you until you have. I just want you to have a few sessions..." Leaning on the dresser table next to the bed, he waited for him to argue over the fact, or for some kind of reaction; none was forthcoming. Instead he found himself surprised at the sudden cooperation.

"A few?" Initially he thought about protesting, but then realised that if he was ever going to get back to his duties, he had to play it by the book. Looking up at Carson, he knew the Doc was concerned for him, the Doc's expressive eyes clearly reflecting that he wanted to do more for him, but couldn't. So, he relented, " Okay Doc, you win. If that's what it will take to show you I'm okay, I'll make an appointment immediately." At this moment he'd agree to anything to get out of the infirmary.

_Okay, well that was different_, and certainly not the response Carson was expecting. Outwardly his friend appeared fine, but inwardly he knew that something was brewing under the surface, he just couldn't put his finger on it. "One more thing."

_So close_, he sighed, rolling his eyes in frustration. "What?"

"If you have any delayed symptoms, and I do mean any, colonel. You must come and see me immediately. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal."

"And…"

"That's two things, Doc." The first he could live with, but he wasn't so sure about the second.

"You're not to go off world for at least a week."

"A week! You're kidding, right? I thought you said my tests were normal. I've even promised to go and see Doctor Heightmeyer. Come on Doc, I know you like to take precautions, but don't you think that's a bit excessive?" A week, there's no way he wanted to be stuck in Atlantis for that length of time, and definitely not with Kolya on the loose. During the course of a week, he could be anywhere, doing who knows what. And it was going to drive him nuts.

Seeing the protesting expression in his face, Carson tried reasoning instead, "It's not like it's going to kill you." Frowning at his own choice of words, he continued, "Sorry. Look, if everything appears normal, and Doctor Heightmeyer agrees that you're okay, you'll be allowed to leave the base, but only then. I'm sorry colonel, I know it's not what you wanted to hear, but put yourself in my place. You were captured, tortured slowly, your body has been aged significantly, almost up to the point of death I might add. And if that wasn't significant enough, your life has been magically restored, so you're damn right I'm being cautious."

With his rational thinking kicking in, he finally agreed. He knew damned well that if it were anyone else this had happened to, he would have said the same thing. It was just the thought of Kolya having that time again to set up another base of operations, and doing whatever else he needed to attain his goal. And although he had heard Ladon was still scouting the planet after they'd left, he had no doubts believing that Kolya was well and truly gone, and there was nothing he could do about it…at least not yet. In the mean time, he had to make sure that he was cleared for active duty; otherwise he wouldn't be going anywhere.

* * *

Sitting alone in the commissary, John stared into his unfinished plate; the food that he'd been moving from one side to the other lay cold and untouched around the edges. He'd subsequently been released from the med bay, and had up until now that is, finished only one of a handful of sessions with Doctor Heightmeyer; and he wished it were going better. The Doc knew he was holding back, so did his team. The more he tried to convince himself that everything was okay, the more he realised it wasn't. It wasn't as if there was anything specific that he could put his finger on, and he wished he could explain what he was feeling, but…it just wasn't his way.

"Feel like some company?" The soft voice asked behind him.

As he turned to face the familiar voice, he wasn't sure if he wanted any company or not. Rodney had tried it earlier, and he'd dismissed him almost immediately. Maybe he really did need to speak to someone. "Hey Teyla."

"Is it okay?" She asked motioning to the seat across from him. Watching him tentatively, in an effort to gauge his mood, she was unsure of how he'd react to her presence. She'd already been pre-warned by Rodney, who'd told her in no uncertain terms that the colonel was obviously in a melancholy mood, and that she had better get down to the commissary ASAP, and snap him out of it. She smiled at the memory. Tactfulness was never one of Rodney's strong points, but she also knew that it was part of his charm.

"Did McKay send you?" he asked, knowing full well what the answer was.

"He is…concerned." Teyla put it to him, a lot more diplomatically than she was sure Doctor McKay would have liked, "We all are."

It was time for a bit of honesty. "I know I'm being a pain in the ass. Sorry. It's just…" Just what? The nightmares that had plagued him since he got back home, or waking up in a cold sweat at the thought of Kolya trying his experiments out on his team, his family? And while he had promised the doc that he would come back if he had trouble sleeping, he just couldn't face the amount of questions that followed. So, he played it down, and acted like he was fine, when he knew damn well he wasn't. Something gnawed at him from the pit of his stomach, but he honestly believed that it had more to do with the time on his hands than anything else. He hated sitting around not doing anything. It had gotten to the stage where even Elizabeth was kicking him out of her office. "I hate this," he finished simplistically.

"Would you like to talk about it?" Teyla broached carefully, leaning her body forward to show she was interested. John remained silent. She waited patiently, and it reminded her of that night on the Daedulus when they'd gone to find Ronon. It showed her just how much he was willing to sacrifice for his friends, and it only seemed fair that she reciprocate the gesture, even if it was something as simple as just being there.

After giving it some serious thought, he decided against it, he didn't want to burden her with his feelings of…of what? Hell, he didn't even know what he was feeling these days. In the end he just shook his head and said, "I'm fine, don't worry, " before getting up and leaving a bewildered looking Teyla wondering if it was something she'd said.

End of Part II


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Apparently has PMT and chapter 3 won't work for some people, so i've uploaded it again for those that haven't been able to access it :o)

fingers and toes crossed it works

* * *

Chapter 3

"_We never understand how little we need in this world until we know the loss of it__"_

As the week slowly passed, and the sessions with the Doc seemed to roll into one, he'd finally made up his mind to go and see what Rodney was up to. It had been nearly 3 days since he'd sent him packing and was only now starting to feel a bit guilty. Getting bored with his own company, he decided that self imposed isolation just wasn't his thing…not this time anyway, and that even fighting with Rodney was better than being by himself for another day. He didn't know why McKay was avoiding him, but if he didn't speak to him soon, he knew it would only get harder. However, the only hard thing at the moment was actually finding McKay to apologize. Eventually after searching the lower decks for the last half an hour, he finally found him huddled underneath one of the ancient consoles, working furiously on the crystal colored circuitry. Watching from a distance, all he could hear was McKay talking to himself.

The room he was standing in seemed to be similar to that of the chamber they had found a few months ago, filled with devices that they hadn't yet initialised. The glass stained windows looked out towards the north tower of the control room, and for the first time in several days he lost himself in the crashing of the waves that echoed in the chamber. It was peaceful. He stood memorized for a few minutes before remembering the reason why he was there in the first place.

"What are you doing?" Sheppard finally asked aloud, startling his friend out his concentrated efforts.

"Ow!" McKay shouted sitting up quickly at the sound of the unexpected voice, and in doing so banging his head in the process. A long drawn out nasally whine followed from the area where McKay was working. Rubbing his head he frowned in annoyance, "The least you could've done was warned me that you were standing there."

"Sorry. Did you know you sound like a mad scientist when you work?" Sheppard asked, curious to know if he realised it or not.

"It helps with the thinking process." McKay answered appearing to sound uninterested. Ignoring his friend once more, he returned his attention to the console. "Anyway, what are you doing down here?"

"Looking for you actually," he told him truthfully, squatting down to see what McKay was working on.

"Why? Did Elizabeth kick you out of her office again?" McKay questioned absently, pulling out what looked to be a burnt crystal from the unit, and eyeing it suspiciously.

"No. And for the record that was only the once," the indignant reply came as John shuffled his feet to get in a better position.

"Where did you learn to count? You do know that I've been talking to Zelenka don't you?"

"Fine it was twice."

"What about when you…"

"All right, so it was three times. It's not like you've never been kicked out before," John finished with a hint of annoyance. This wasn't getting him anywhere.

"So what do you want?" McKay asked distracted at something he found.

"I came to apologize if you must know."

Putting his tools down, he sighed. _Great! Just what I need right now on top of everything else I'm working on._ "What did you break this time?"

John was getting frustrated with him. "Nothing. And would you stop fiddling with that damn thing and at least look interested when I'm trying to apologize."

Sliding out from the under the consol, he wiped his dusty hands on his overall, and then cutting to the chase asked, "So if you didn't break anything, why are you apologizing?"

That's what he liked about Rodney, direct as always. "About the other day. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to piss you off, I was just…out of sorts so to speak." There, he'd said it, and it actually came out easier than he expected.

"Oh that? I didn't even notice." Rodney replied offhand, and then taking a moment for his thoughts to catch up, carried on. "You know you really need to learn to not be so sensitive, it's not a great leadership quality."

"Thanks, I'll remember that for future missions." John retorted with a hint of sarcasm, the likes of such appearing to be totally wasted on his friend.

And that was that. Apology accepted, whether it was warranted or not, at last they were back on speaking terms. But still he needed to know. "So why have you been ignoring me if you weren't upset?"

"It's called 'working'." McKay stated doing his head bob action as he normally did when emphasising a point, "You remember the concept don't you? I know it's been a while, but…"

"McKay." It was a plea for him to just shut up and spit it out.

"Well, if you must know I was working on a surprise for you."

"A surprise? For me?" Shocked at the kind gesture, he smiled at his friend. Then waited for him to explain what the surprise was, but after a minute of waiting patiently for an answer and getting no response from his otherwise occupied friend he continued, "Well?"

"Well what?" Completely sidetracked by the whirring of the ancient device, he completely forgot Sheppard was standing there waiting for an answer.

Rolling his eyes, he thought the whole conversation was getting ridiculous. "My surprise."

"Oh that. It's not finished yet."

"So I don't even get a hint?" Sheppard asked hoping that if he bugged him enough McKay would just give in and tell him anyway.

"No you don't." McKay smiled as the large brick red console finally came to life. Ignoring his friend once more he turned his attention back to the machine he'd been working on for the last few days. Turning around to Sheppard he asked, "Are you still here?"

"Fine, I know when I'm not wanted," he replied indifferently, trying to get a better perspective on what McKay was working on, and getting no joy. "Call me when your finished on whatever it is your doing."

"Yes, yes, yes," he waved dismissively, shoving him out of the chamber when he wouldn't budge. "Go and annoy Elizabeth some more. I need to concentrate, and you're in my way." McKay finished bluntly, finally getting rid of his annoying distraction.

Satisfied that he'd at least sorted out one friendship, he knew that there was only one other person he needed to talk to: Ronon. John wasn't under any illusion whatsoever that the conversation with him was going to be as easy as it had been with McKay, far from it. Fully aware of Ronon's feelings surrounding the Wraith, and with his own actions that day, he trudged down the corridors of Atlantis to find him. Knowing full well where his friend would be, and had been for the past few days. A sense of dread built up inside and his stomach churned. This was definitely one conversation he didn't relish having.

With all the down time his team were having as he 'recuperated', as Doctor Beckett liked to put it, everyone seemed to have gone their own way within the last few days. Ronon had spent most of his off time sparring in the gym with Teyla, of which he honestly believed was his unconscious way of venting his frustrations at the world, but mostly at him. And if he were being honest with himself, if their roles were reversed, he would probably feel the same.

Watching his colleagues sparring was impressive. Their carefully crafted actions as they each evaded the other's weapon was, to say the least, mesmerising to watch. He doubted he would ever be as good as Teyla, partly because he didn't think he had the discipline in him to train, but also because as he once told Ronon, he was just naturally lazy.

"Hey!"

Distracted by the voice, Teyla lowered her guard and consequentially, Ronon took the advantage throwing her hard across the floor.

_Oops. _His timing was definitely off today. "Sorry," he told her sheepishly walking towards her and picking her up off the floor. "I didn't mean to distract you."

Grabbing his hand, John hoisted her up. "Don't worry, colonel. We were almost done anyway, weren't we Ronon?" She told him, before diverting her gaze to the man who had just knocked her on her butt. Her eyes silently conveying to him that this was the perfect opportunity for them to deal with their issues.

Completely ignoring her question, he simply picked up his things, replying, "I'm done." Ronon stated brusquely, before staring at John intensely with a look that John thought could potentially rival Medusas'.

"Ronon, give him a chance." It was a heartfelt request from her. Teyla knew they needed to talk it out, but ultimately she knew how stubborn Ronon could be. Sighing, she watched as Ronon ignored the colonel, and then stomped towards the exit, not giving either one of them a second glance. With her attention now directed towards Colonel Sheppard, she watched as he stared after him. "I'm sure he will come round, colonel. He is…just angry about the situation. I am certain that when he calms down, that you will be able to talk it through."

"I know." John replied solemnly as he stared at the now vacant doorway, where his friend had once been, sincerely hoping that their friendship hadn't been irrevocably damaged by the choices he had made. "Thanks for trying anyway."

As he got up to leave, she placed a hand on his forearm. "I'm here for you if you ever want to talk"

John nodded in understanding leaving her alone with her thoughts, it was going to be a long week.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"_Anger is seldom without an argument but seldom with a good one."_

* * *

"Colonel! I thought we were going to have to send out a search party for you." Carson admonished lately. 

Not wanting to meet his gaze, Sheppard shuffled his feet listlessly, his eyes never making contact with the Scottish Doctor. He knew only full well that the Doc would realise something wasn't right. His whole demeanour since his return to Atlantis reflected just how frustrated his was at the whole situation; no matter how much he tried to hide it. He tried relaxing his posture, in an effort to show, at least outwardly that everything was fine; but one thing the Doc was good at, was reading him. "Sorry, doc, I've been kinda busy."

"Oh? Doing what?" Beckett looked at the condition of his patient and new fine well resting had obviously been at the bottom of his list.

"This and that. You'd be amazed at how much paperwork builds up after a few days out of the office," John told him cagily. At least he was being honest to a degree. What he neglected to mention was the fact that the paperwork usually got finished in the early hours of the morning when his current bout of insomnia robbed him of his sleep.

"What part of 'no working', didn't ye understand, colonel?" Carson reminded, crossing his arms accusingly.

"I didn't think you meant paperwork, Doc. I mean how much trouble can I get into reading mission reports?" Sheppard flashed him his most innocent smile in an effort to throw Beckett off. But as soon as he opened his mouth, he realised it was a futile gesture.

"That's not the point, colonel and you know it." Carson watched his patient carefully for signs of a guilty conscience; none was forthcoming. "Sit yourself down on the bed, I need to check your blood pressure and run some more blood tests"

"Again? I swear doc, you're becoming like Dracula. I'm not going to have any blood left at the rate you're going."

"I can assure you, colonel that you've got plenty to spare, now be quiet while I take your blood pressure." Carson placed the sphygmometer on his arm and waited patiently for it to record an accurate reading. As the numbers settled, Carson took a deep breath, 150/96. This was not good. "So, have you been relaxing at all these past few days?"

Sheppard took one look at his friend and knew full well it was a trick question. Normally, Carson would say that he was as healthy as a horse and send him on his way. Not this time. He was guessing that this was the Doc's way of finding out if he had things on his mind. "I told you I was."

"Really?"

He couldn't lie, not to the Doc. Beckett had a way of sneaking under his defences and getting him to admit things that he wouldn't normally reveal. "How can I relax when I'm…"

Beckett waited for him to finish; the young pilots frustration at the situation came through loud and clear. Pulling a chair over from the next bed, he sat down waiting for him to finish. It never came. "Colonel, we're all trying to help you, but we're not mind readers."

Taking a deep breath he told him truthfully, "I'm not good at sitting around doing nothing, doc."

"I know you're anxious about re-joining your team, colonel. But my responsibility is to ensure that my patients don't take unnecessary risks where their health is involved. I know relaxing is not something that comes easy to you, especially when it's forced upon you. But I won't release you for active duty until I can see a definite improvement in your blood pressure. That means no stress, no strenuous exercise, and _no_ arguments. I want-you-to relax and get some proper rest, and that means _no_ getting up in the middle of the night finishing off paperwork." Beckett cocked his head knowingly, indicating that he knew exactly what Sheppard was doing in the early hours of the morning. "If you can't sleep, you come and see me. If you're having trouble relaxing, you come and see me. Do you see a pattern forming here, colonel? The sooner you start doing as you're told, the quicker your blood pressure will come down to a more manageable level and the sooner I'll authorise your return to active duty."

Sheppard hated the speeches; he rolled his eyes, which unfortunately didn't go amiss by the good doctor. _Oops_! Sitting there like a good patient should, he waited for the Doc to get off his soapbox, "I am trying, doc," he advised him, trying to sound sincere, but failing miserably.

"Yes, my bloody patience."

"Sorry." He tried to look suitably chastised, and managed it to some small degree. If nothing else, at least it sounded as if he was prepared to make the effort. "I promise that I will try and take things easy, if it'll make you feel better."

"It will. Look, colonel, we're all worried about you, we just want you to know that you don'thave to handle this on your own."

Now he felt guilty. "I know."

Carson watched him careful to see if aything he'd said had sunk in, but was under no illusions that this was going to be a long week. Finally believeing that he was getting somewhere, he tried to lighten the moment, "Now, as soon as we've got some blood of you, you'll be free to go about your day, okay?" He hoped that over the next few days that the colonel would start opening up to those that cared, but he wouldn't hold his breath.

* * *

"I've got it!" Rodney declared triumphantly rushing over to Sheppard who was slumped on the sofa in the entertainment room; a bucket of popcorn cradled between his legs. 

"Whatever it is, don't pass it on to me, I've spent more than enough time in the infirmary thanks very much." John retorted solemnly, lapsing more into a melancholy mood. He grabbed another handful of popcorn, before recklessly throwing it in the air, and catching it spectacularly in his mouth.

"Nice to see you're being productive during your down time." McKay stated unsympathetically. For the last few days, he'd done nothing but pour his heart and soul into helping his friend, and what did he get for his efforts? Snarkiness!

"Thanks. So what have you got?" The colonel enquired, only mildly interested.

"Your surprise is ready." A smug expression exuded from him. John quickly turned to face his friend; completely forgetting the bucket in his lap, and in doing so knocking the popcorn all over the floor. "I'm not cleaning that up by the way," Rodney added.

"I thought you were used to picking 'kernels' off the floor, Rodney?"

Rodney rolled his eyes at Sheppard's dismal attempt. "Oh ha ha. As usual, your pathetic attempts at humour leave a lot to be desired."

He tried to get him back on track, but it wasn't easy. "Can we get back to my surprise please? You've left me hanging for days." As a consequence of his continually rising blood pressure, the Doc's prescription of rest and relaxation so far was not going according to plan. It didn't matter that his attempts at telling the Doc that being cooped up in Atlantis was what was causing the rise in blood pressure; everything fell on deaf ears.

McKay put on his serious face. "Before I tell you, I just want you to know that I understand why you did what you did."

John didn't know what to say. Eventually he found his voice, but mostly because McKay had continued to stare at him until he spoke. "You do?" that was about all he could muster at the moment.

He never was a very good liar; Teyla had told him to be supportive and he tried in his own way, but a barefaced lie? What was the point in that? "No, not really. None of us do, but I thought it would make you feel better."

John frowned at him, his eyes squinting at his friend's lack of diplomacy. "It did, for about 5 seconds." The sarcasm once more appeared to be completely wasted on his friend.

McKay continued happily as if completely missing the point. "So, now that's all settled, shall we move on?"

Sheppard pulled a face at his friends' complete lack of tact, "I insist on it."

"Good. So, how would you feel if I told you I _might_ have found a way to trace Kolya and his leading band of rebels?"

He couldn't believe it. "Are you serious?"

"Trust me, when it comes to Kolya, I do not jest." He still bore the scar inflicted on him by Kolya's cronies, something he wouldn't forget in the near future.

"You know what Rodney, I could kiss you right now." Ruffling his hair, he felt as if a tonne of bricks had been lifted from his shoulders.

Taking a step back, Rodney pulled a don't-even-think-about-it face, not that he had a problem with his male friends showing affection, but after the whole weird 'kissing Beckett' encounter, it wasn't a place that he planned to revisit anytime soon. "That's not funny. I still have nightmares over the last time something like that happened, and I've never been able to live it down." Still he rambled, "Do you know how long it took for the old rumour mill to forget that? Never! So don't even go there."

He loved watching his friend squirm, it hardly ever happened. So when it did, he enjoyed it immensely. Trying not to outwardly show his pleasure at his friend's previous misfortune, he covered his hands over his mouth, stifling a smile that played on his lips. He didn't have the heart to tell him that it was him who had kept the old rumour mill going for so long. Not only that, but he had the only copy of the video clip from the security cameras to prove it, to use as leverage – just in case Rodney ever got out of hand.

McKay shuddered to shake off the distant memory and tried to focus again. "Anyway, enough of that. You know I didn't realise how much of a genius I was until just recently. I swear the thought just came to me in a flash of light. I was sitting in the commissary and then I remembered something Ladon said, and did you know I worked on the database for nearly three days, and nothing? I think the lack of sleep finally got to me, so…"

Then a thought popped into his head "Quick question." Not that it made any difference to him, but his curiosity was piqued. "Why have you been working on a new database when we have the ancient one?"

"Didn't anyone tell you? That Ancient woman, what's- her- name?" McKay clicked his fingers as if that would somehow magically conjure up the name, and surprisingly it worked. "Morgan Le Fey! That's it. Anyway, she took off after SG1 left, and locked the base out of part of the mainframe. I thought you knew? You know she really fooled us. Just think, we've been searching for real life Ancients since we got here, and there was one staring us in the face the whole time. So, since she left, we've been trying to merge some of the databases into one, because let's face it, it's completely impractical to keep coming down here when you need something. Plus that place gives me the creeps, and it's cold and damp. On top of that it plays havoc with my allergies. You know, with all the potential mould spores, I could catch anything down there." He shivered unconsciously at the thought of having to spend one more day in what he referred to as the basement from hell. And if he was being honest, he actually felt a little lonely down there by himself, not that he'd admit it to anyone though.

John shook his head at his friends' obvious hypochondria, and tried to get him back on track. "What about the redundant systems? The Ancients always seem to have one of those lying around."

_What did I just say?_ "Hello? What do you think I've been trying to fix for the last 3 days. I swear none of you listen to anything I have to say unless it's got to do with either 'Rodney fix the jumper' or 'Rodney, save the planet' or…"

_Blood pressure rising. _"McKay!" He was beginning to wish he'd never asked. "Okay, okay, forget about that. Just tell me about Kolya before I get apoplexy. You do know that I'm supposed to be lowering my blood pressure, don't you?"

"Sure…"

"So, shut up and get to the point," his patience finally exploded.

"Well stop asking me stupid questions then. You know yelling isn't going to help with your blood pressure." McKay cautioned in an attempt to be helpful.

Count to 10! 1- Breathe in, 2- Breathe out, 3- Break McKay's nose… 

"Sorry." Apologising was not one of McKay's strengths, but since his friend was about to explode if he didn't get to the point, he carried on, "Anyway, moving swiftly along, Ladon said something that got me thinking. He told us that he had betrayed Kolya after realising that neither Kolya nor Cowen had it in them to lead his people. So, I did some digging around the database and found some very interesting things about our good friend Kolya. About 15 years ago he apparently worked with a scientist in an underground experimental laboratory, not dissimilar to what Cowen and his team had before the whole betrayal and revolutionary revolt saga. Anyway, after the coup some 5 years later, the base, from what I've been able to ascertain was abandoned due to the increase in culling and Wraith activity. So, it got me thinking. Where do you go to lick your wounds?"

Sheppard didn't have a clue where this was taking him, but over the last few years he'd learned to trust him for the most part. "Home?"

"Exactly. Now the problem is, the database is a bit sketchy on where that particular location is, but thanks to my brilliant research skills, I've been able to identify three possible coordinates. Whether they're accurate or not, I don't know, I mean this stuff is thousands of years old and the database wasn't very clear about where the information came from, unless of course they were secretly keeping tabs on their allies."

A thought occurred to him. "Hang on a minute Rodney, if what your saying is true, why would anyone go back to a Wraith infested planet?"

Rodney gave him an arrogant look, "Did I say it was Wraith infested now?"

"No, but…"

"So shut up and let me finish. You remember the Wraith queen giving us all those schematics, codes and everything when she was pretending to be our ally? Well, I tweaked some of the encryption codes that they gave us, and as it turns out, we can monitor where every Hive ship in the Pegasus Galaxy is, at any given time, instead of when the Hive ships are approaching the city. It's not dissimilar to the device that Kolya took back when he stormed Atlantis. Anyway, all we have to do now is relay it through our new systems, and hey presto it should tell us if the Wraith are in the vicinity of the co-ordinates from the database."

John was getting impatient. "So, when can I have the 'gate addresses?"

"Shouldn't be too long, but it's not like you can go anywhere just yet." Realising what he said, McKay backtracked. "What I mean is, you're not fit to go anywhere." Sheppard wrinkled his nose at him with distaste; he didn't appreciate being reminded that he was still on sick leave. Crossing his arms in a defiant posture, he waited for McKay to rephrase his point. "Shall I start again?"

Sighing, John shook his head, "Don't bother." What was the point? He knew exactly what he meant, and he really wasn't that far off the mark. But now he had the opportunity to do something about the bad taste in his mouth. The only thing left standing in his way was trying to convince the Doc and Heightmeyer; otherwise he wouldn't be going anywhere.

Mulling over what McKay had told him, he tried to put all the pieces together, "Okay, just to get this straight then. You think that there is a good chance that Kolya is hauled up on one of these planets that he lived at years ago?"

"Yes, potentially. Although it's not like I have a crystal ball or anything. But then again, when have I ever been wrong?" McKay smiled smugly, never doubting his own abilities.

"Where shall I start?" John smiled dangerously.

_You blow up one solar system, and everybody becomes a critic._ "Shall we get back to the business at hand, please?" He didn't wait for an answer. "All I have to do now is merge the data to the central database. You on the other hand have to convince Elizabeth. And, well, how hard can that be?" Secretly he wasn't that hopeful. He didn't think for one minute that Elizabeth would sanction the search, but he owed it to his friend to at least try.

Without wasting another moment, John rushed out of the recreation room and headed towards Elizabeth's office. This was it. Finally. Kolya was going to get his comeuppance once and for all.

"A thank you would have been nice." Rodney shouted after him, but didn't expect a reply.

* * *

"No." 

"What do you mean 'no'? Elizabeth, do you know what you're saying? By saying 'no' you're essentially sanctioning his ongoing experiments against innocent people. This isn't just about me, it's about every-single-time we step foot on another planet. Whose to say that next time it won't be Teyla, or Rodney, hell even you for that matter?" Sheppard was more than angry; he'd surpassed that a few minutes ago. Now he was pissed. Here was the perfect opportunity to do what was necessary, and she was flatly refusing.

Like she told Kolya on the video screen when she refused to give up Ladon to save John from torture - now she was telling him. "I'm not going to go there, John." She remained firm in her stance. From talking to Doctors Beckett and Heightmeyer about what he'd gone through, she was determined that he was not going to look for trouble, particularly as trouble seemed to have a habit of finding them first. Their recent brush with Kolya had shown just how far he was willing to go to get what he wanted, and she wasn't under any allusions about Kolya's ongoing plans. Ultimately though, she wasn't prepared to risk the lives of the entire expedition on a revenge attack, so she put her foot down. And now, consequentially had to contend with a short-tempered colonel. Irrespective of how angry he got, she wasn't budging. She'd seen his temper up close and personal, and this time was no different. "I know you're angry."

Pacing around her office, he couldn't believe what he was hearing. Looking her straight in the eyes, he banged his fist on her desk rattling the ornament given to her by the Athosian people." You're damn right I am!"

Closing her eyes, she tried to gather her thoughts, "Colonel, let's be honest with each other here. Your motives for this mission are based understandably on personal feelings towards Kolya. You're not thinking of the risk you'd be imposing on the base, or on the safety of the expedition. So-I'm-saying-no." She watched his reaction carefully, hoping that he'd understand her position, but he wasn't having any of it. "I am not prepared to risk your life or the other members in your team because you want revenge for what happened to you." From the look on his face, she knew she'd not come far off the mark. "Colonel, believe me, I do understand."

Leaning on her desk, he looked directly at her, his eyes smouldering with unfocussed rage. "With all due respect Doctor Weir, you don't have a clue. I may be reckless on occasions, but I'm not stupid."

For a moment Elizabeth wanted to knock the attitude from the side of his face. She knew he was baiting her, but she refused to bite. "No you're not, but you are angry."

"Of course I'm angry, wouldn't you be?" That was an understatement. "But even if I am, I would _never_ jeopardise the safety of my team, and you know it." His breathing was heavy with emotion. The intensity in his eyes was all too evident as he silently dared her to disagree with his logic.

"Normally I would agree with you, but this time, after what happened? I really don't know. And I'm not the only one who's concerned." Elizabeth wasn't quite sure where to look, he had a right to know about where she'd gotten her information from, but she just wished it didn't have to be this way. He'd been through so much these last few days, but ultimately her primary role was to ensure that Atlantis and its personnel were not put in unnecessary jeopardy.

He unfurled his clenched fists in an attempt to prove she was wrong, but he doubted he could reign in his anger for much longer. "I am still the military commander on this base, and if I believe that there is a very real threat, then I'm sure as hell not going to sit around and wait for it to bite us in the ass." He banged his fist against her desk to get his point across. "Kolya, as-we-speak, is preparing his forces to strike against Atlantis, you know that as well as I do."

"We don't know that, John. I mean from what you told me, it seems as if he was more interested in Ladon than seizing Atlantis." She hoped by the use of his first name, that he would see she wasn't the enemy in all of this. In truth it was a futile gesture.

"Why the hell do you think he took me captive? Because he liked my company? Get real, Elizabeth. The bottom line is, Kolya wants Atlantis. And I think Ladon was an excuse, nothing more. For God's sake Kolya he even told me that he was prepared to take Atlantis by storm to take out Ladon, because we pissed him off by siding with him. What more proof do you need?"

Running a hand across the nape of her neck she tried to ease the tension building up there, but in reality was getting nowhere fast. "If Kolya attempts to seize Atlantis by force, then we will take the necessary actions to stop him. I know you wouldn't intentionally put this base at risk, but that is ultimately what you're suggesting. And for the record, colonel, as well you know, this isn't a military expedition; it's a scientific one. Your standing orders are to protect this base and its occupants, there is nothing in those orders that states you will carry out pre-emptive strikes against known hostilities. So you show me in the fine print that says our original standing orders have been rescinded and I'll let you go."

She was a skilled negotiator; he'd give her that. But, he wasn't backing down on this. And as it stood, neither was she. "This isn't over Elizabeth." Shaking his head, he knew they'd reached a standstill. It was pointless wasting his breath arguing with her over this. It was time to take matters into his own hands, and he did just that by walking out of her office without so much as a backward glance.

Sighing inwardly she thought, _well that could have gone better._

Storming out of her office actually felt like the best thing he'd done in days. He couldn't understand why he was the only one in Atlantis to see the threat. Maybe Elizabeth was right about him wanting vengeance for what happened, but that didn't take away from the fact that he knew Kolya, and what he was planning to do. He just wished he could make everyone see that.

Quickening his pace, he headed down to the control room, and almost knocked over Zelenka in the process. The smell took him by surprise, and it stopped him in his tracks. All he could hear was the Czech scientist apparently irritated at something McKay had done, and wondered what his friend had done now to tick off the mild mannered scientist.

"No offence Doc, but you…"

"Smell. Yes I know. Four times I shower, and yet still I receive looks, it is all Rodney's fault." Then he rambled. John wondered if this was the case with all scientists, or just genius's. "Go and fix the irrigation tank, Radek. Make sure the system has been purged properly. And you know what?"

John dreaded asking.

"They did not purge the tanks properly, and with the pressure, it exploded onto me. There I was covered in this…smell. I mean of all the stupid things to go and do. Right as I was standing there."

"Try lemon juice, doc," was all he said wrinkling his nose at the stench that must have been seeping through the Czech's pores.

"You know I think I will, but it will be on Rodney." Zelenka replied, visibly plotting against his friend.

Shaking his head to rid himself of the image, he advised, "That's not exactly what I meant doc." Rodney moaning, scratching himself, driving him nuts, dying? No it wasn't worth it, besides he still needed his help. "I mean use the lemon to wash with. It will help with the smell, I promise."

The Czech scientist smiled, "Thank you. Maybe then someone will work with me again. Or maybe I will go and find Rodney and work with him before I shower, maybe teach him a lesson. He came here gloating about finally fixing the Ancient database, while you were in with Doctor Weir. I swear I do not know how that man manages to fit his big head through the doorways."

"Where is he now?"

"I think he's down on one of the lower levels."

Patting the man on his arm he replied, "Thanks Doc, I'll catch you later." With that he took off, clicking his headset on the way.

He heard Zelenka call after him, but Sheppard was nearly all the way across the control room before he finished his sentence.

End of part IV


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Angry people are those who are most afraid"

* * *

He'd tried calling him on the radio, but to no avail. Either the radios were on the fritz, which he doubted, or Rodney was definitely avoiding him this time. After searching for the last 45 minutes, his mood hadn't improved. But it didn't matter now; after searching everywhere he could think of, he had an idea where he might be hiding out, and why. 

Eventually he found him with Ronon and Teyla, hiding out in his lab. "I've been calling you for the last half an hour, why the hell didn't you answer your radio?" The words spat out before he had a chance to calm down.

"I know you have. Why do you think I'm hiding in here with my bodyguards?" He told his friend simply and honestly moving nearer towards the tall Satedan as if gaining a place of safety..

"Colonel, Rodney told us about the 'gate addresses." Teyla told him calmly, not quite sure how he would take the news.

And from all accounts, not well.

"Oh he did, did he?" His bloodshot, sleepless eyes remained firm on McKay while he tried to reign in his temper.

"Well I didn't exactly say it was a secret, and after what Elizabeth said…." His voice trailed into nothingness. _Hello foot, this is mouth…_The last thing he wanted was for his friend to know that he'd been talking about him behind his back, but it was too late.

"After Elizabeth said what, Rodney?" His face grew redder as his attempts at controlling his blood pressure fell by the wayside.

Ronon interjected, "Look Sheppard, we have an idea of what you're planning. McKay said…"

Sheppard cut Ronon off. "McKay has a big mouth!"

The words cut through Rodney like a knife; his friend thought he had betrayed him.

The harshness in Sheppard's voice was now clearly aimed at Ronon, who had obviously decided that now was definitely not the time to keep his mouth shut. "And, I thought you weren't talking to me?" It didn't matter that Sheppard's plans were to seek Ronon out later on and apologize - now he was on the defensive, and his friend was right in the middle of the firing line. "Rodney, I want those 'gate addresses." It wasn't a request.

"No." McKay stood firm; he wasn't going to let his friend go off and do something stupid. His whole plan for helping his friend had backfired. The idea was that they would all help him. But he'd heard Sheppard in the control room, and heard the shouts loud and clear – he'd never put his team at risk, which only meant one thing, whatever his plans were; he was going it alone.

Sheppard moved within an inch of his friend, his face burned with fury. "Give me the damn 'gate addresses, Rodney."

"Colonel, please." She tried to intervene, but he refused to look at her. Her commanding officer's attention was firmly placed on Rodney; and it seemed as if an unforeseen battle of wills was taking place between them. "We understand your frustrations, but Rodney is only saying 'no' out of concern for you. We want to help you."

Finally his eyes met hers. He pointed his finger aggressively at her - warning her to keep her distance. It was between him and McKay. "Stay out of this Teyla, it's got nothing to do with you."

"That's enough." Ronon's voice was firm and authoritative as he took his stance in between them. This was getting out of hand.

"Ronon, it is okay," she told him softly placing her hand on his chest in an effort to calm him down, and let him know that she could handle things herself.

"I thought you were my friends," Sheppard spat vehemently facing each of them in turn, "But friends don't go sneaking around behind each other's backs."

Pulling a face at his friend's absurd statement, Rodney couldn't help himself and jumped right back into the firing line. "Don't be stupid, of course we're your friends"

McKay's words fell on deaf ears; he was beyond being reasonable at this point. "You know what? Forget it!" Each word was enunciated as he made his last point loud and clear. "I don't want your help!" With that, he left his friends reeling at his harsh words. Nothing they said was going to make him change his mind about going after Kolya.

It was pointless trying to stop him now, when ultimately they knew the only choice they had was to keep him safe and make sure he didn't do anything stupid. Thankfully he wasn't cleared for duty yet, which for all intense and purposes was their safety net for the time being.

"This is all my fault."

"Don't blame yourself, Rodney. You had no way of knowing that he would react like this." She tried to reassure him, but her skills didn't seem to be working very well lately.

"I'll go talk to him." Ronon said staring into nothingness, ashamed that his own actions may have contributed to his friend's unhappiness.

Nodding in compliance, each of them felt in some way responsible. It didn't matter that they had no reason to; it was just that their friend was hurting, and they felt helpless.

He couldn't believe that Rodney had flatly refused to help him, so much for friendship. But it didn't matter, he'd get his answers one way or another and he didn't need McKay's help to do it.

Within seconds Ronon had caught up with him, John could feel the soft vibrations under his feet getting stronger.

"Sheppard." He called out, quickening his pace until he caught up.

Stopping dead in his tracks, his eyes burning with anger, he turned to face the tall Satedan man standing casually as if nothing Sheppard said could phase him. He didn't really need to say the words, his body language said it all, but he couldn't keep his harsh words in check any longer, "What do you want, Ronon, because I am not in the mood."

"I can see that." There was no anger or animosity now in his baritone voice; it simply reflected that he was concerned.

He knew the only reason Ronon had followed him was to talk him out of it. Ronon had been through a similar ordeal, and as a result understood what normally motivated him - but not this time. "If you've got something to say, spit it out, or don't waste my time."

He cut to the chase. "You're crazy if you think you can get Kolya this way. You know that don't you?" He waited for his friend to speak, but received nothing but stony silence. He baited him in the hopes of getting his friend to open up. And if anger was all he was going to get, then he'd take it in a heartbeat. "Do you really think he's out there rushing into setting up another trap after what just happened? Like any good leader, he'll regroup his forces and wait until the time is right. It's a good lesson." He told him with a note of finality, incorporating a subliminal warning to his friend to back off, or risk serious consequence.

Sheppard clenched his fists in frustration; no matter what he did he couldn't get anyone to understand. His voice grew in volume as he tried once more to get his point across. But it was a futile gesture; everyone seemed oblivious to the danger that lay ahead. "He's out there planning his next strike against us, and I seem to be the only one who gives a damn."

Whether he agreed with Doctor Weir or not, it was irrelevant. He always followed the chain of command; it had to be that way, or people died. And living on Atlantis had shown him that they respected the same values he did, and he wasn't about to cross that line - even if it was to help a friend. "You have no choice."

"Don't bet on it!" All rational behaviour had gone out the window, and he walked away resolute in his plan to do whatever it took - even if it meant disobeying Elizabeth.

* * *

Although night had settled in Atlantis, and most people were in bed, John found he couldn't sleep; too much dark imagery assaulted his mind. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Kolya laughing at him, urging him to take vengeance. The skeleton staff shuffled around the base of operations, not that it was really necessary; Atlantis was like a well-oiled machine. His eyes were blood shot from lack of sleep, the shadows under his eyes were becoming more pronounced as the days passed slowly; he was living on pure adrenaline. He needed access to the database, but after several failed attempts at finding the 'gate addresses of the Genii outposts he had almost given up finding them. The only way this could happen would be if someone had deliberately buried the information. He clenched his fists in frustration.

"Colonel, can I help you with anything?"

Zelenka!

"Doc, your timing couldn't be more perfect." The blonde haired Czech smiled at being wanted. "I need some information, but I can't access it. Any chance you can give me a hand?"

"What is it that you are looking for?" Zelenka enquired skimming his hands over the ancient database.

"McKay said he had uploaded some information regarding the Genii, but I can't access it. Can you do a search for Genii outposts, or Genii history? I'm looking for anything that shows a 'gate address."

"Of course." Within only a few seconds, the scientist realised what the problem was. The confusion with what he was reading made him lapse into his native tongue, "Tato does ne mít smysl?" he said out loud, and not to anyone in particular, as his eyes scanned the information on the readout.

"What?" He really needed to get himself a Czech dictionary.

"Sorry, this makes no sense."

He peered over the small man to gain a better perspective. "What's the matter?"

"I don't understand. The information is encrypted. Why would someone do that?" Zelenka scratched his head in confusion, before trying an alternate method to extrapolate the information.

_McKay!_

"Can you override it?" John asked knowing full well what the answer was going to be.

Zelenka seemed doubtful; he looked up to see a dejected man standing before him, and wished he could come up with a solution. "It looks as if someone has input their personal code to block the data stream. I'm sorry, colonel, without access to that, it could take a few days."

_Damn him!_

He'd never seen the colonel so despondent before. Fully aware of what the young man had gone through, it pained to see him like this. "What about Sora? She would probably be aware of at least some of the history involving the Genii, maybe she can help?"

_Sora_! Of course, why hadn't he thought of it before, she worked with Kolya, and had trained with him for some time before the seize on Atlantis. She had to know. "I owe you one, Doc."

He smiled; pleased he could, even if it was in a small way. "Glad to know I can be of help."

"More than you know, Doc. Believe me." And then he was gone again, running off into the slightly illuminated corridors of the Lantean city.

* * *

As the night drew to a close, John watched from his quarters to see the sun starting to rise in the distance. Running his hands over his face, he could feel the puffiness around his eyes from lack of sleep, that and the massive headache, which bored into his skill showed just how tired he was. His normally kempt appearance was marred by stubble, which had far exceeded his normal 5 o'clock shadow. He'd never allowed Kolya to get to him this way in the past, but this time it was different.

Sarcasm and wit had always been inherent in him when he went up against Kolya, and he'd never lost sight of that, until now. Whether it was from the fact that the Genii commander had surpassed a level of inhumanity that had taken Sheppard by surprise, or the fact that he'd learned that Kolya had deliberately and purposely carried out experiments with the Wraith, and on innocent people in an effort to attain his goal. He honestly didn't know. But it wasn't just that. Something else had taken place on that planet; he knew it instinctively. He could feel it driving him forward. With each passing day it grew stronger. And today was the day it was going to be silenced once and for all. The pain and suffering Kolya had inflicted on him was nothing compared to what he was going to do. There was no way in hell he could risk Kolya doing that to any member of his team…his family. And he had to be stopped.

He allowed his hands to flow through his rakish hair and let out a slow releasing breath. He was beyond tired, that much was too apparent. Walking over to the mirror, the reflection in front of him appeared to be that of a stranger. His usual tanned appearance now looked sallow. The sparkle he usually held in his eyes had long ago disappeared, and all that was left standing before him was a broken man searching for justice.

Consequences be damned. He had to do this. Not just because he believed what he'd told Elizabeth that day in her office, but because he couldn't live with himself knowing that Kolya was still out there. Each day it tore at his soul. He knew he was being irrational – he wasn't that far gone, but when he weighed it up against what he would lose if he didn't go, there was no comparison. And so it had to be this way.

Staring out of the window, dawn was breaking; people would be waking soon. He had to hurry. He couldn't take the chance that they would try and stop him. The early morning clouds parted to allow the sun to rise across the ocean and he knew it was time to go. He'd already gotten all the information he needed from Sora and now he was as ready as he was ever going to get. Glancing back across to the ocean one last time, the echoes of the words he told Teyla reverberated in his head, _I'd do anything for any one of you. If I had to give my life the way Ronon was going to, I would. _This was his family; the only one he'd ever known, and he was damn well going to protect them - no matter what the personal cost might be.

His backpack felt heavy as it nestled between his shoulder blades, with his P-90 fully loaded Colonel John Sheppard prepared to head off into the unknown. Not that, that wasn't uncommon since he arrived in Atlantis, but this time though, it heralded a certain amount of finality as he climbed into the jumper that had brought him at one time or another to hell and back. It had saved him many a time in the past, and hoped against all the odds that it wouldn't fail him now.

Peering over to the other shuttles in the jumper bay, he wondered if he would ever see this place again. And even if he did succeed with his mission, what the future held for him in Atlantis. He was disobeying a direct order; there was no taking away from that fact. Ultimately it could mean the end for his stay in Atlantis, or worse - his career in the Air Force. Shaking his head, he had to get rid of those thoughts, because they were liable to get him killed; he couldn't have any doubts or hesitations. Without any more delay he started up the engines. With already disabling the communiqué from the jumper to the control room, he knew he had the element of surprise on his side. As the craft powered up, his fingers deftly worked their magic on the layout in front of him, and within seconds he had manoeuvred himself into position.

As soon as the doors opened he descended towards the 'gate room. He knew he would only have a few minutes before the klaxons began sounding, but he was ready. His adrenaline kicked in one more time as the ship lowered in front of the 'gate. He dialled the address that Sora had given him as the alarm bells rang around him. It wouldn't be long now before they had found out where he had gone. Time was running out – in more ways than one. He ignored Radek's shouts of warning to him, and as the 'gate came to life. The security teams had now made their way to the 'gate room; their weapons aimed directly at him. He murmured an apology and sped through the vortex to his awaiting destination; he'd done it.

End of part V

AN: I hope I got the czech translation right. If not 1000 apologies and I hope it wasn't too big a cock up, lol.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"_Honor isn't about making the right choices. It's about dealing with the consequences."_

* * *

Within minutes, news began breaking out all over Atlantis; hushed voices could be heard throughout the 'gate room as people tried to fathom the reality of the situation; Sheppard was gone. Faces tinged with anger and regret flitted across the faces of McKay, Teyla, Ronon and Doctor Weir as they began to learn the truth about what had taken place a short time ago. Elizabeth stood over the Czech scientist as he tried to explain what had taken place moments before.

"I don't care how it happened, Radek. We can sort that out later." Weir's usually calm demeanour was now uncharacteristically abrupt as she tried to gain the facts of the situation.

McKay suddenly had a thought. _There's no way he could've gotten past my encryption codes_. He had to check and make certain, there was no time for niceties, "Radek, move." Gaining access into his files he realised that there were no signs of them being tampered with. Sheppard couldn't have gotten hold of the data Rodney had found. So he must've gotten them from someone else.

"Rodney?" Elizabeth waited impatiently for him to at least give her some good news, but from the increasing lines protruding from his forehead, it didn't seem likely.

There was no point in telling her unless it was absolutely necessary. "I thought he might have… Never mind."

Elizabeth frowned; they were getting nowhere fast. "I want that 'gate address gentlemen, and I want it now."

Rodney was past frustrated. Didn't anyone understand the finer concepts of the Dial Home Device? "Elizabeth, it's not as simple as that. We need time. The 'gate doesn't normally hold previous co-ordinates in the system; we have to go into the memory buffer to retrieve the data."

"So what's the problem?"

_Tick-tock, tick-tock. Wasting time._ "As I've mentioned before, the 'gate is not like caller I.D, it's not designed to store addresses. It leaves a slight residual imprint on the master crystal, yes. But it's not that simple to retrieve the coordinates…"

Zelenka chimed in. "Even if we are able to do this, we may not be able to correctly identify the last address, and it could potentially take us hours…possibly days to find the correct one, and even then…" Radek couldn't continue.

McKay didn't want to say it out loud, because then it would make it true, and he didn't want to go there. But she had a right to know. "What he's trying to say is, that the chances of us locating Colonel Sheppard is virtually impossible. By the time we've gone through the 50 or so addresses that it has stored, it could be too late." He lowered his eyes, unable to look at the others. He knew only too well what they were thinking, because they were his thoughts and feelings. His team were fully aware that if he hadn't been the one to put the idea into Sheppard's head, they wouldn't even be having this conversation.

Weir wasn't prepared to accept that. "I know you and impossible, Rodney."

McKay rolled his eyes in annoyance; crossing his arms defensively he told her, "Contrary to what everyone might think of me, I am not Scotty. I don't create impossible scenarios just to make myself look better. Sure, I'm a brilliant theoretical astrophysicist, but if I'm being honest with you, it is purely by dumb luck and a certain amount of creativity, that I have, on the odd occasion, managed to do the impossible."

She looked at him with seriousness in her eyes. "Then I suggest you get lady luck on your side, Rodney."

For once, Rodney didn't know what to say.

The silence in the room was deafening as the sinking reality of the whole situation set in. Radek turned directly to Doctor Weir, his voice held none of the surety that had always been inherently in him. "There is something else." He saw them all turn to face him, and he hesitated briefly before plucking up the courage to finish what he started. "I am sorry, Doctor Weir, but this is my fault I think."

Everyone eyed the man with incredulity – how the hell had Zelenka become embroiled in all of this? McKay was the first to speak. "What did you do, Radek?"

"I thought I was helping." He bowed his head, only now fully understanding how he was partly responsible for the mess he'd found himself in.

His hands gesticulated wildly. "Well as you can quite clearly see for yourself, you didn't. So stop wallowing in self pity and tell us what you did." With his hands firmly planted on his hips, he looked across to his friend with a piercing gaze.

Raising his hands, slightly deflated, he replied, "We were just talking. He was looking for something about the history of the Genii in the Ancient database, but he couldn't access it, so he asked for my help."

"And of course you gave it to him." Rodney accused.

Zelenka tried to explain, but failed miserably. A confused expression crossed his tormented eyes. "I didn't know what he was planning."

Rodney as ever was straight to the point. "So let me get this straight. A sleep deprived man walks up to you, wanting information on the man that nearly tortured him to death, and you thought 'what the hey'? Where were your brains Radek?" In truth he couldn't exactly blame his colleague, not when ultimately he had planned to do the same thing.

Weir gave Rodney a warning look to back off. Placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, she reassured him, "It's not your fault."

"I tried accessing the information, but it was encrypted."

McKay chimed in without thinking, his concern for his friend and frustration at the whole situation was now bubbling to the surface. "I know. I encrypted it."

Weir was now no longer looking at the Czech scientist. Instead her penetrating gaze fell on McKay. "You knew about this, and didn't tell me?" She stopped herself from taking it any further; she'd deal with him later. The only information she wanted now was the ''gate address that Sheppard has used. As Rodney tried to explain his unconventional actions, she put out a restraining hand up to stop him. "I'll deal with you later, Rodney. For now I want you to work with Zelenka and get me that address."

"If it is of any help to you, Sora might know where Colonel Sheppard has gone. That's who he went to see when I could not access the file." He didn't know if it would help any, but right now his concern was for anything but himself.

"Teyla, Ronon, you're with me. Let's see if we can't find any answers to this whole mess. And Sora may be a good a place to start as any." Turning to face her two most intellectual scientists Weir told them in no uncertain terms that she wanted result by the time she got back, and there was no room for argument.

Carson rushed in and saw the normally calm Doctor Weir storming out of the 'gate room with Teyla and Ronon in toe. He'd only just found out that the Colonel had gone AWOL and was gunning for some answers. "Doctor Weir!"

"Not now Carson, talk to Rodney. I'll be back shortly to fill you in." She waved him off dismissively. Carson could, for all intense and purposes wait for answers, but she couldn't. She needed to know what Sora and John had discussed before it was too late.

Beckett shook his head, not quite believing what he'd been told. He approached Rodney with an air of apprehension. He didn't want to believe that the Colonel had gone off into the night after disobeying a direct order. He knew the lad wasn't sleeping well, but he had no idea things had gone this far, and he blamed himself. He knew the young man was in trouble, that was clear for all to see, but he'd put his trust in him and unfortunately that had been his downfall.

"Will somebody please explain to me what the bloody hell happened?" Carson demanded.

_There's no time for this. _"Cliff notes version – Colonel Sheppard went nuts, stole a jumper and is now somewhere in the Pegasus Galaxy hunting Kolya. Will that do it for you?"

"Didn't anyone try and stop him?" It was a simple question in the grand scheme of things, but Rodney wasn't in the mood to explain everything that had taken place over the last few days.

_What the hell kind of question is that? _McKay shot him an incredulous look"No Carson, we just packed him a lunch and told him to have a good time."

McKay was getting on his nerves, and he snapped in annoyance, his brogue Scottish accent now flowing thick and fast. "Don't be facetious Rodney, I'm only trying to understand what bloody happened."

"Yes, well, take a number and get-in-line." When the pressure was on, the only thing Rodney could do was snap. He knew he shouldn't be taking it out on Carson; it wasn't the Doctor's fault. But since his friend wasn't here for him to yell at, and he couldn't exactly yell at himself, the Doc was the nearest target. "Now if you'll excuse us, Radek and I are attempting the impossible and you're in the way."

Radek mumbled apologies under his breath as he and McKay worked on the buffers. Between the two of the greatest minds on the expedition it would take a miracle to pull this off, and that was an understatement.

* * *

Sheppard exited the vortex and prepared to cloak the jumper, but as fate decreed, he didn't get the opportunity. Within seconds after his arrival the ship came under fire. Rocket propelled grenades bombarded the jumper, he swerved, but it was too late as one of the RPG's connected with the ship. Trying to manoeuvre out of range, he swerved pulling a hard left as they continued taking pot shots at the puddle jumper, each one missing the ship by millimetres. As he attempted to engage the cloak, a warning alarm sounded in the jumper, checking the readouts, he realised that it was badly damaged. Beads of sweat broke out on his forehead as he attempted to evade the weapons fire. _Could this day get any worse?_ Abruptly the ship lurched violently as one of the main drive pods shut itself down as a precautionary measure. Checking to see if he was now out of range of the shooters, he swiftly took stock of the damage to his ship. Luckily enough the craft hadn't sustained any major damage. He soon came to regret those words. Suddenly and unexpectedly, multiple bursts from several energy weapons emanated from the ground and struck the jumper hard. _Good one John, you had to open your big mouth!_

He desperately tried to stay in his seat as the craft lurched forward sharply, and the inertial dampeners went offline. The impact forced Sheppard to lurch forward resulting in his head colliding hard on the console. As the ship shook violently, Sheppard tried to quell the sensation of falling into nothingness as his vision blurred from the concussive effect of the blow to his head. Clinging on to consciousness, he tired to shake off the pain from his blinding. Reaching up his hand, he attempted to stem the flow of blood from his head wound, which seemed intent on obscuring his vision. As the systems in the jumper began protesting under the strain, John knew instinctively that he was going to crash. The only thing he could do now was at least make it a controlled impact, and hopefully salvage the jumper at some later time. Gaining as much distance from the Stargate and local structures as possible, Sheppard tried to land the jumper in the outer edges of the forest in the hopes of at least concealing it to some degree. Luck however didn't seem to be on his side as the ship's engines cut out, and he lost control, crashing hard into the trees.

As he began drifting back to consciousness he realised that something was very wrong; he knew it instinctively._ Of course something's wrong you idiot, you just crashed your favourite jumper. _Pain first, then a sudden overwhelming odour threatened to overpower him as it infiltrated his nostrils. He could feel the tightness building up in his chest, suffocating him. Momentary panic set in and he coughed to expel his lungs of the obstruction. Ignoring the blinding pain in his head, he forced himself to open his eyes. All his senses suddenly kicked in at once when he realised it was smoke. Smoke was enveloping the jumper. _Crap! Rodney is going to kill me. _Then a little voice crept into his head._ Only if you actually make it out in one piece. _It was a good point. As the smoke continued to infiltrate the jumper, his survival training began to kick. Attempting to move his legs he found his body jammed in the wreckage. He realised that he probably had only a few minutes of breathable air left in the jumper; he had to make a move, and fast. Behaving like a contortionist; he blindly searched for the control panel to release the hatch; his eyes watering form the smoke stinging his eyes. Lying in the pitch black with smoke distorting his senses, he had no idea how much time he had left to release the hatch. The crushing sensation in his chest seemed to becoming decidedly worse as air quality inside the jumper was getting dangerously low. Deftly searching for its intended target, his fingers tried to locate the panel to open the rear hatch. Trying and failing miserably to conserve what breathable air was left, his lungs burned in protest; time was definitely running out.

_Finally!_ As if by magic, the rear hatch descended, and he forcibly extricated his body from the debris and crawled out, only just remembering to snatch his backpack en-route. Gasping for air, he tried to gain some distance from the jumper; slowly making his way on his hands and knees to the nearest clearing, his chest wheezed with the concerted effort. Coughing up the vile taste in his mouth he slumped against the nearest tree he could find unable to go any further. He looked over towards the jumper and wondered if the Lantean crafts actually blew up. Given the length of time they'd been around, and the damage that he and his team had inflicted on them previously, he doubted it. But he sure as hell wasn't prepared to sit and wait to find out if he was right or not. Stealing a look at his favourite jumper one last time, he sighed. Smoke billowed from all sides; the only good thing so far was that it hadn't blown up. Just maybe it was salvageable? He snorted at the absurdity.

He couldn't stay near the jumper; it was just too risky. So with that thought, he tried to stand and found he couldn't. Panic threatened to overwhelm him. His rational side knew it was due to the lack of oxygen in his blood, but for a brief moment he couldn't think rationally. He tried to slow his breathing down and gain some perspective he just needed a moment. Collecting his thoughts, he waited for the heaviness in his chest to subside and his breathing started returning to its normal even rate. He supposed that now was a good a time as any to catalogue his injuries. _Fingers? Check. Toes? Check. Torso intact? Check. Head intact? Hmm, not so much. _Touching his head, he winced at the large haematoma forming where his head had collided with the console. Taking a large self-adhesive bandage from his medical kit, he carefully positioned it over the now gaping hole in his forehead. The good thing was, he didn't think he'd sustained any serious damages, just a lot of cuts, bumps and bruises, nothing Beckett couldn't handle if he ever managed to survive the mission. But then again, if he didn't, it wouldn't make a blind bit of difference if Beckett could fix him up or not.

Things were not going well.

Given the fact that he'd been shot at on arrival, he doubted that it would be too long before the soldiers sought reinforcements and went after him. With the jumper spewing black smoke into the atmosphere, he had to get as far away from the wreckage as possible. He flexed his legs making sure they were working now before heading off into the dense forest. He smiled in relief at the familiar sensations returning to his extremities. The structure he'd past was only a couple of klicks from his current position, but he needed time to get fully mobile again. He just hoped this was all worth it after all of this.

Flinging his pack over his shoulder he traversed himself around the undergrowth, moving as quickly as possible into the luscious green vegetation that would be his shelter for the next few hours. The sun was setting high in the sky cascading down rays of light through the branches of the trees. The further in he went, the thicker and more overgrown the scrub became, eventually he came across a small gully surrounded by colorful exotic plants and brush. The botanists on Atlantis would have a field day. And with that small reflection, his thoughts turned inward to his team. He knew his rationale had been a bit off the last few days, and deep down he regretted to some degree what he'd put his friends through, particularly with Rodney. They had a strange relationship, he knew that Rodney didn't make friends easily, possibly due to his inept social skills, and that was probably the same reason they had become friends. Neither one was particularly apt at forging friendships, but since he'd arrived on Atlantis, all that had changed. For once he'd actually found himself a family for the first time in his life. But even given all of that, it didn't take away from the fact that he believed what he was doing, and that it was the right course of action. And nothing was going to dissuade him from finishing what he started.

A noise in the distance broke his thoughts. Voices! And they were getting closer.

* * *

"Doctor Weir, what a pleasant surprise. Four visitors in 24 hours, I'm flattered." It had been nearly 2 years since she and her commanding officer had tried to seize Atlantis. During her confinement in a small isolated part of the city, watched continuously by a security detail, she could count on one hand how many visitors had come; and now this.

Weir had hoped that all this time in confinement would have made the young girl mellow somewhat. She couldn't have been more wrong.

"Hello Sora."

Taking a moment to look at each of them, she recognised Teyla immediately, it had been a long time since she'd seen her, but the other man seemed unfamiliar. It didn't matter anyway; she had a general idea why they had come to see her.

"We need your help." Her question was short, bittersweet and straight to the point.

"What's in it for me?" If anything, she was determined to get something out of this and was prepared to hold out until she got just what she wanted. It wasn't as if she had anything to lose.

"Your freedom." Weir was not going to spend hours thrashing it out with the young blonde Genii and was prepared to let her go.

"Interesting. You must be really desperate to grant me that. I wonder why that is?" Sora baited as she casually sauntered around her quarters. A small smile played on her lips.

Teyla shook her head. This was pointless, she knew how Sora liked to play games, but she'd hoped that through her confinement the young woman would have, at the least, had time to look at the errors she had made in her life. But in reality, she hadn't changed at all. "Sora. You and I were once friends, brought together by a common enemy. These people are not your enemy."

Sora wasn't prepared to give them anything at the moment. Still bitter over what happened on the hive ship she wasn't prepared to let this go. "They killed my father!"

Teyla, normally the voice of reason, wasn't prepared to waste time and effort on something that wouldn't come to fruition. They had little time to retrieve the information and she was through playing mind games with her former ally. "No, they did not. And you know that just as well as I do. Your father was killed by a Wraith as he attempted to save your planet. He was a casualty of war. Let us not to play games here, Sora. You know where Colonel Sheppard has gone, and we want the location. Are you willing to assist us or not?"

Sora looked thoughtfully at them, they sounded sincere and really all she wanted to do now was go home. "Why should I help you?"

Weir interjected at this point. "Because it would be in your best interest." Her answer was either going to be yes, or no. The problem was, if she did refuse their offer, their hopes at actually finding Colonel Sheppard would be an almost impossible task. "Let me ask you this, Sora. Why were you willing to provide the locations of Genii outposts to Colonel Sheppard, yet not for us?"

"Sheppard killed fifty seven members of my team. Fifty-seven! One of them was the commander's only son. After what Sheppard did to our men, Commander Kolya will kill him on sight. So, I told him where he would most likely be. And I hope, that when the Commander does capture him, he will torture him slowly and painfully, and make him suffer just like my friends did when he killed them."

"For the record, Kolya has already tried that and failed. Only it wasn't only him that carried out the torture, it was a Wraith at Kolya's hands. Were you aware that Kolya teamed up with the Wraith? Those that killed your father?" Doctor Weir knew it was a slight exaggeration on what had actually taken place, but as a skilled negotiator, she knew exactly how to get what she wanted, and this might be the only way.

Sora shook her head emphatically. _No. It's not true. He would never betray us like that. _"I don't believe you."

"It is true." Teyla told her softly.

Up until now, Ronon had stood silently in the corner, but now he had something to say. "The man that you call your leader is using innocent people as a pawn in his twisted game and then feeding them to the Wraith."

"You're lying." Her voice was now shaking with uncontrolled anger. There is no way that Kolya would join forces with those that culled her village…her home, her family, her father. But then, why would they lie?

Elizabeth knew she was on the edge of believing them, but to drive the point home, she clicked her headset. "Rodney."

McKay's hurried voice came through loud and clear onto her headset. "You've been gone less than an hour, there's not been nearly enough time to…"

Doctor Weir was in no mood to listen to his ramblings. "Rodney, shut up for a minute and listen to me. I want you to download the video feed from Kolya's message and I want you to bring it down to me now."

A slight hesitation came through in his voice. He'd witnessed it first hand, and had hoped to God that he would never have to speak of it again, let alone see it. "Elizabeth…"

"Just do it, Rodney. Weir out." She looked around at the others, each of them nodded in support of her decision.

* * *

Picking up pace, Sheppard precariously traversed the vines that seemed that seemed intent on wrapping themselves around his boots. Each movement jarred his bruised and battered body; his head pounding with each step. Squeezing his eyes shut in an effort to block out the pain from his head, he winced making the pain ten times worse. In an effort to clear his mind from the searing pain, he listened intently, he couldn't hear the voices of only a few moments ago, but he wasn't taking any chances. Quickening his pace he proceeded to put one foot in front of the other, the only sound he could hear now was that of his feet treading heavily onto the autumnal leaves that scattered the forest, and his own heartbeat. Eventually he stopped to catch his breath. Hiding behind a large tree that obscured his body, he listened intently for several minutes for any signs that he had company. After feeling secure in the knowledge that he was alone once more, he tried to slow his breathing and consequentially stop the bile from rising in his throat before he vomited. The only thing that was keeping him going so far was what awaited him in the outbuildings at the far edge of the clearing. Kolya!

_Maybe doing this on my own wasn't such a great idea. _The thought lasted on a second, but it freaked him out. He'd never felt like this on any away mission before. _Snap out of it. _He berated himself for even thinking such a thing, and hoped that was the end to any niggling doubts. He'd literally gone through hell and back to get this far, and he wasn't prepared to give up now.

A guttural growl from behind him interrupted his thoughts, and it stopped him dead in his tracks. Something was waiting to pounce. His heart rate accelerated exponentially as he stood silently, not daring to make a sound. Cautiously he raised his P-90 in the advance of the danger ahead. The leaves rustled in another direction and he swiftly followed the sound with his weapon. The hairs on the back of his neck stood to attention, and a decidedly bad feeling converged in the pit of his stomach. Something was about to have him for dinner.

He felt a breeze rush through his hair, and turned around at the same time that he felt a stunner hit him squarely in the back; he went down hard. Everything was happening so fast that he didn't have time to stop his head colliding with the ground. His P-90 flew out of his hands, leaving him vulnerable. Sheppard felt the air expel from his lungs so quickly that he didn't have a chance to catch his breath. His vision began greying around the edges, and then suddenly a sensation of falling into nothingness.

Just before mercifully passing out, he felt himself being forcibly placed on his back, and then his shirt being ripped open. As the large beast was preparing to extinguish his prey, Sheppard opened his hazel eyes one last time.

Just before the moment of his death, he saw clearly the predator for the first time. The words of only a few days ago echoed loudly in his ears, _'all bets are off!'_

His luck had finally run out.

AN: Thanks for your reviews everyone, they're much appreciated.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 9**

**"_The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship."_**

* * *

Rodney held the PDA in his hand, the information already downloaded onto the handheld computer. The only reason he could think of why Elizabeth had needed the information was that Sora was not playing ball. It had been a long time since he'd seen her; 18 months in fact since her, and the Genii had tried and failed to seize Atlantis. While he wasn't overjoyed in finally having to see her again, he realised this was a necessary step forward - just in case they couldn't obtain the correct details from the dialling computer. Nevertheless he didn't think he could trust her again after what happened and he was counting on Elizabeth to make sure they wouldn't regret asking her for help. 

It took McKay all of 30 minutes to get down to the lower decks, and would take him at least another half an hour to get back up to the control room. He hoped it was all worth it and that their trust in her wasn't misplaced. Turning into the corridor he watched the guards standing, their stunners raised in anticipation of movement from their prisoner. He nodded at them and walked towards his friends.

"Thanks." Elizabeth stated simply taking the PDA from his grasp, and activating the file received from Sora's former commander. Her eyes were heavy set with determination as she thrust the data pad towards the young woman's hand. Her tone held an edge of warning to Sora that whatever games she was playing was about to be stopped here and now. "You wanted proof?"

As Sora edged towards Doctor Weir, she carefully took the device eyeing it sceptically as if it were a trap. As the screen came to life, she heard the familiar voice of her mentor. Her eyes grew wide with disbelief as she watched the turn of events of that fateful day unfold before her. Kolya's voice was filled with animosity that she had heard so frequently that night they attempted and failed to seize Atlantis. His demeanour was apparent to all who witnessed the recording that Kolya was prepared to do whatever it took to gain control, even it meant allying with an enemy that had culled their home. They were right.

Shock

Anger

Betrayal

A thousand and one emotions built up within, and she continued to stare in disbelief at what she was witnessing. None of it made sense, but here it was, as clear as day. Her stomach churned and she physically recoiled at the images displayed. Sheppard was gagged and tied to a chair; guards positioned carefully either side to stop their prisoner from escaping; not that it was possible given Sheppard's current predicament. Anger turned to disgust as she watched with revulsion as Kolya stood by and allowed…no encouraged the Wraith to feed. The image of him goading the creature physically repelled her, but she couldn't tear her eyes away from the screen. The colonel's life was being extinguished before her very eyes. Thoughts exploded in her mind all at once. Was this how her father had died? She felt used and humiliated. _How could I have been so blind?_ "Now it's 2 hours!" She heard Kolya's last words echoing around her confine as the PDA fell from her hands. She felt the need to turn away, not wanting the others to see how much of an impact the recording had affected her.

Her air of superiority seemed to have vanquished as she turned to face them. The edge in her voice, now no longer held the sarcasm as it once did. Trying in vain to control the quavering in her voice, she told them unambiguously, "I don't know where he is. I gave Sheppard a location, but I don't know if he'll be there or not." She folded her arms subconsciously across her chest, as if trying to protect herself from the barrage of angry faces that crossed her field of vision. "For all I know the Wraith could still be there, that's why Kolya left in the first place. But I've only heard of the place, I've never actually been there. He told me once as I trained with him that he hadn't been back in years, and that he wanted one day to go back home. That's all I know."

Ronon shook his head in disbelief. "So why send him there if you didn't think Kolya would be?"

"Because if the Wraith are still on the planet, then Sheppard would suffer like my father. And if Kolya were there, the revenge would be his. Either way I'd have avenged not only my father's death, but that of the men that lost their lives at Sheppard's hands."

"I want the address." There was no room for argument within her statement. Elizabeth passed the young girl a notepad, she wasn't going to go away empty handed even if that meant forcing her to write the symbols. Seeing the look of disdain at Kolya's actions in Sora's eyes, she knew she didn't have to.

* * *

"Am I dead?" 

The gruff voice responded with what appeared to be a slight chuckle in his voice. "You are still very much alive John Sheppard."

_Okay that's kind of creepy. _He blinked as if trying to focus his field of vision; pins and needles tore through his nervous system as if protesting the effects of the Wraith stunner. He tried processing the information, but the only thing his brain was able to comprehend was the fact that he was still alive.Then it hit him, like an energy blast, it had called him by his name. Bolting upright, he shook off the last remnants of the stunner blast and stole a good look at his captor. He chewed on his lower lip as if trying to question carefully, "Okay." He started off slowly not quite sure what to say. He initially wasn't going to remind the Wraith of their last conversation, that 'all bets are off', but he was just too curious for his own damn good. For the first time since he'd been hit, he looked his captor squarely in the eye, "Now don't take this the wrong way. And please, don't feel the need to act on the stupid question that I'm about to ask you, but…why the hell aren't I dead?"

The Wraith sat forward slightly, placing his arm across his bended knee to prop himself forward. His intense gaze made Sheppard shuffle himself back against the tree beside him. "You do not know?"

A confused expression washed over him. The Wraith's response seemed pretty innocuous, but then there seemed to be something else in his eyes that he couldn't work out. From his own understanding, they'd both agreed when Sheppard had left him on the planet, that it was fair game if they met up again. But now this… He didn't know what to make of it, "Honestly, no. Not that I'm complaining mind you." A strange sensation settled over him and he actually felt surprisingly calm. That in itself should've set off warning bells, but for some unknown reason he felt himself relaxing.

"You needed me, so I came."

Sheppard looked across it him, with an incredulous expression. "I did, did I?" _Wow, that must've been one knock on the head. _"And you know this…how?"

"We are brothers."

Screwing his face up tightly, he still felt repulsed at the whole 'Brothers' situation, and told him so. "Okay. You know what, you said that before. And I have to say, it kinda…freaks me out." He rubbed the bridge of his nose in an effort to clear away the last remnants of the stunner blast. None of this made any sense. "I know I've hit my head, and maybe I'm suffering from brain damage…and am slightly delusional from lack of sleep. But I've got to say, I think I'd remember asking for help from a wraith."

A nod of understanding came from the Wraith; he expected this. "As I have said to you before Sheppard you are very much like a Wraith. This I found when I fed upon you, but more noticeably when I initiated the 'Gift of life'." He watched carefully as Sheppard unconsciously shivered at the memory. "You have intrinsic properties within you, that are unique to any human I have fed upon. When a Wraith feeds, we inject an enzyme into your body's bloodstream to ensure your palatability." John wrinkled his nose in disgust at the whole process, and whether he realised it or not, he found himself instinctively zipping up his sweater. He'd been through it once and wasn't in any hurry whatsoever to have it described to him in detail; he'd leave that to Beckett. The Wraith appeared to ignore his unsettled emotions, and continued to explain the method in more detail. "Consequentially as a result of this act, we as a species have access to your body's chemical compounds during this process. With you I was aware of something very different within your genetic make up. It is unlike those I have fed on before. Are you aware of how we came to be?"

_Not again! _"Oh believe me, I'm more than familiar with that part of your evolution thanks very much."

"Your genetic makeup is not that dissimilar to our own, in that you possess certain attributes from those that we have evolved from."

_Ellia!_ The sudden realisation hit him full force as if he'd been kicked in the chest. Without hesitation, John pulled up his sleeve, and sure enough it was still there after all this time. He'd completely forgotten about it. It was a part of him now, ever since Ellia had tried to feed on him several months before. The Doc had told him it would disappear in time, but up until this point he hadn't even given it a second thought. Although he'd told the others that he was '100 John Sheppard again', that statement wasn't strictly true as he stole another look at the raised gray blemish that still remained on his right forearm.

Now he was beginning to understand.

John ran his hands through his rakish hair, not quite sure what to make of it all. If this was true, then could he ever return to Atlantis? He remembered how everybody had initially treated Teyla when they had found out she had elements of Wraith DNA in her genes. Would they still trust him after they found out? He honestly didn't know.

The Wraith appeared sincere, as he moved closer to Sheppard in the hopes of putting his point across. "We are brothers, John Sheppard. Not just for the fact that I shared your life force, but because I am now a part of you. For when returning a life we merge ourselves with our brothers and become one. One mind, one thought. In pursuit of our aims we join together. There is something within you that urges you forward is there not?" He knew the reply before John answered the question, he could feel it inside.

Shepard didn't know what to say. He couldn't get his head around the fact that the two of them were in some way bonded. Sure, he'd felt allied when they were on the planet together and had subsequently attained their freedom, but never once did he believe that this was the reason. But the Wraith was right, for days now he had sensed something within him getting stronger each minute. He'd forced himself to believe that it was just posttraumatic stress disorder or something innate to the Pegasus Galaxy, but this? "I don't know how to explain it, it's a sensation…"

"Burning through your veins…"

"Yes!" That was it exactly, finally someone understood. But that would mean that he was even starting to think as a Wraith would. And that was the scariest feeling of all.

The Wraith observed the young man's understanding, before watching his face turn from understanding to fear as he realised what he was becoming. "It is a survival instinct inherent in all of us, it drives us forward to eliminate those that we believe are a threat to our very survival. A deep impulse emerges within us to take the life of another, no matter what the cost."

John shook his head vehemently and felt a longing to get up and walk around. Deep-seated fury burned within him, and he paced as if it would somehow improve the situation. _I am not a Wraith! I am not a Wraith!_ Repeating the words like a mantra, he thought by saying them over and over, then it would make it so. But it didn't negate from the fact that everything the Wraith had said so far, was exactly right, there was no denying that. But, he wasn't going to accept it, and that was that. He tried to reign in his rising anxiousness, but to no avail. His words spewed from his lips like a volcanic eruption, "You're wrong. I'm nothing like you! We helped each other out and that's it, end of story. You go your way and I'll go mine."

The Wraith took in his appearance and stated simply, "You are mistaken. I can feel it building inside, burning like a fire raging waiting for that moment to seek retribution. Do not fear it Sheppard, for it is a part of you now. It will guide you on your journey to accomplish what is necessary. I can help you my brother.

"Will-you-stop-calling-me-that!" Sheppard was getting more agitated as the Wraith continued to regard him as his brother. It didn't matter what he said, he wasn't prepared to believe that he was turning into a Wraith.

A feral growl escaped his lips as if displeased with his human counterpart. "Very well. But know this Sheppard, if you plan to continue your journey, you will not succeed alone, nor will you prevail with your injury."

"I'm fine. Believe me, I've had worse." John told him with a note of finality; desperately wanting to get as much distance from him as he possibly could.

The Wraith sensing Sheppard's fight or flight response moved in and ushered a warning to him of the dangers that lay ahead. "Before long, the others will be here. They are now fully aware that this world is occupied and are currently headed to take what is rightfully theirs. Once they arrive I cannot protect you from them."

"I don't need your help!" The words fell from his lips all too familiarly.

The bitter words spat from his lips, and he snarled baring his blackened teeth. "You think you can kill my master by yourself? Many have tried - all have failed. He will seize you as he did before. Those who plot the destruction of others often fail at the attempt. The next time you will not survive."

John stopped pacing and came within millimetres of the Wraith now standing before him, his clenched fists turned white with anger and irritation. "Look Confucius, I will do whatever it takes."

The Wraith grunted; his nose furrowed at his growing impatience with the young human. The challenge in his voice rose up into the atmosphere, "Are you that ignorant Sheppard to believe you were the only one to have suffered at his hands?"

Sheppard for once didn't know how to answer him. If anyone had the right to seek vengeance it would have been the Wraith; years held in captivity at the hands of a man seeking power, and willing to succeed at all costs. The Wraith was right to some degree, but it didn't mean that he wasn't also justified in seeking retribution. John lowered his head, contemplating the words just spoken. "I'm sorry. I know that you came to help. I guess I lost sight of that." He paused for a moment to let it all sink in; still not quite believing that once again he was preparing himself to ally with a Wraith - even if it was one that had ultimately given him back his life. He shook his head, as if not quite comprehending the full reality of what he was about to do. If his team didn't think he was nuts before, they certainly would now, that is if he ever made it back to Atlantis. "It's just that it's you…and it's me."

The Wraith nodded, comprehending the young man's position, possibly because it also applied to him. "I understand that it is not an alliance you welcome."

_That's an understatement!_ "Let's just say it's a bit…unconventional." It took him only a few seconds to decide whether the alliance between them should continue. As he'd told Elizabeth, he was many things, but stupid wasn't one of them. And if the Wraith was offering his help to catch Kolya, then he wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth, no matter whom it might be from. He nodded his head in affirmation; they were going to do this together. For the first time in days, a smile fell from his lips. "Now what do you say about finishing what we started? There's a structure not too far from here we can check out. I don't know if you noticed, but the Stargate is being guarded."

A low husky laugh escaped from the Wraith's lips. "I see that nothing has changed since our last meeting, John Sheppard."

John cast a sideway glance, taking in the words of his new travelling companion, and began to appreciate the man for the first time. "Oh I think some things have."

The Wraith never replied, a simple nod of his head reflected a note of understanding, and the beginnings of friendship between the two men.

Finis Part vii

AN: Thanks for your reviews it's really appreciated :D


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8 **

**"_You really get to know a man if you get to watch him die, that moment right before he realizes it's over, that moment his face reflects every decision he's ever made, what kind of life he led... and if he regrets it."_**

* * *

Walking in silence the two unlikely of companions headed off into the darkness, as night had begun to descend on the planet. Eeriness began enveloping the forest, shadows from the moons only source of light bounced off the trees limbs, as they danced in the breeze. The leaves that had settled on the ground now became a whirlwind of activity as the wind blew them across the forest floor. A mist careered through the undergrowth lying like a blanket on the ground, and the change in temperature dropped considerably as they traversed through the bush. It was just as it had been on that night several days ago, each driven by a desire that apparently went beyond human understanding. Cautiously they kept their eyes open for signs of any Genii activity, by know it seemed likely that if Kolya was here, he would have already been alerted to his arrival on the planet, and Sheppard was not prepared to sit around and wait for the Genii commander to take off again; not if he could help it.

Traversing the foliage in silence, the Wraith stopped suddenly a look of intense concentration washed over him. Sheppard in turn came to a standstill beside him; tilting his head as if sensing something was wrong. A sharp intake of breath preceded the wraith lunging at him with full force, his eyes wide with malice. Sheppard barely had time to react as the Wrath's hand suddenly aimed for his tactical vest. Wide eyed with uncertainty and fear, Sheppard could do more than watch in fear as the feeding hand closed in on his chest, his face contorting at the thought of being fed upon. He refused to scream, he wouldn't give the Wraith that satisfaction. Instinctively, and with a will to survive at all costs, he tried to push the wraith away. There was no time to understand or react to what was happening, as the beast's swift and agile actions took him by surprise slamming his body hard against the nearest tree. Whatever the Wraith's concealed plans were, he wasn't going to go down without a fight. Sheppard's grunts of protest became louder as his aggressor forcibly placed a hand over the colonel's mouth. As John thrashed against his grip, a low growl escaped from his predator's lips. "Be quiet."

_Like hell I will_! The Wraith's grip was powerful, but it didn't stop him from fighting back. Adrenaline rushed around his body heightening his agility and strength.

Holding the young man tighter, the Wraith whispered brusquely in the young man's ear. "We are being followed."

John ceased his struggling, and felt himself being released from his captor's control. Breathing hard against his own fight and flight response, Sheppard forced the hushed words out of his pursed lips. Shaking his head, he tried to rid himself of the excess adrenaline and retorted, "You know, we really need to work on our communication skills."

"Be quiet." The Wraith told him harshly. John kept his mouth shut, but for an instant he finally realised how McKay must feel every time he told him to shut up. It was annoying.

Sheppard looked around searching for any signs of activity, or glimpses of movement in the dense forest, but saw nothing. In the end he decide that the Wraith must have ears like a bat. He mouthed to him, "Where are they?" The Wraith shifted his gaze to a far off vicinity, which was too far out of Sheppard's line of vision. Then he felt it, the sensation of someone watching them; a mixture of apprehension and anticipation caused the hairs on the back of his arm to stand to attention. Finally saw what the Wraith had apparently seen only moments ago - a flashlight bouncing of the trees, and it was heading straight for them.

Without warning a barrage of bullets flew close to him, missing him by inches. The ricochet tore strips of bark to fly off in various directions. Sheppard crouched low to shield himself from the hail of bullets. In the night air, a stream of light jetted from his weapon as the bullets from his P-90 sailed through the air, heading for his aggressors; the blast from his companion's discharged weapon followed pursuit. It was becoming like a game of cat and mouse as the two men ducked and dived behind the trees to avoid the constant onslaught of ammunition aimed at their direction. The night sky lit up like the fourth of July, as the hazy smoke penetrated the atmosphere. Sheppard knew he'd got at least two Genii, but he didn't think it would be long before their position was going to be overrun, they had to get out of there, and fast.

Sheppard shouted above the noise, "How many are left?"

"Three. I have incapacitated two already."

"What do you say to getting out of here?" Just as he said it, he felt a sharp impact in his leg, and he lost his balance. _Son of a…_

"Sheppard!"

In that fleeting moment, everything had changed. There was no way he would be able to keep up now, not with a bullet in his thigh. "Go! I've got your six." He waited for the man behind him to take off, but instead he felt the energy of the stunner gun continue to whiz over his head. He wasn't leaving. "I told you to go!" Sheppard shouted through clenched teeth over the roar of weapons fire.

The Wraith ignored his passionate plea and remained stoic in his stance, "Just like you did not leave me when I was wounded, John Sheppard. I to will not leave you now."

John shook his head, smiling slightly at the irony of it all. Just before he thought everything was going to end badly, the weapons fire ceased, and everything went still in the dead of night. As silence filled the air, Sheppard lowered his gun with the Wraith following suit. Keeping a watchful eye on where the Genii had been, they waited for a moment to see if the offensive would continue – it didn't. They were safe for now, but for how long was anyone's guess. He leant heavily against the nook in the tree, while the Wraith looked on. Tearing open a bandage from his vest he placed his hand tightly on the wound to stem the crimson red blood seeping through his fingers, then proceeded to wrap the dressing securely against the bleeding gunshot wound. He hissed through clenched teeth at the burning sensation in his thigh. Sweat congregated on his forehead at the concerted effort and he forced his mind to concentrate on anything but the pain. Biting his lip, he stopped himself from shouting. If he kept this up there wasn't going to be anything left of him to fight Kolya. Closing his eyes he waited for a moment, gathering as much strength as he could muster. He pushed the agony of his injury to the furthest point of his mind; nothing would stop him from finishing what he started.

The Wraith offered his outstretched hand, and waited for Sheppard to take it; he declined. He needed to do this himself. He had got them into this mess, and he was damn well going to get them both out of it; he just didn't know how. Speaking through gritted teeth and after several attempts at standing, he decided to accept the offered hand without so much as a cursory glance as to which hand he grabbed. "We need to get out of here before they come back."

"Are you able to walk." He asked taking in the dishevelled young man.

"I'll be fine, be we need to move now. Are you with me?"

He answer was resolute, "Until the end."

The pair remained silent as they walked slowly towards their destination. With Sheppard's leg bleeding slightly, it took them longer than they had anticipated to reach the edge of the clearing. Coming to an abrupt halt they heard shouts echoing in the forest, they dived behind the scrub to avoid detection. Sheppard winced as his leg made contact with the ground. He sucked in his breath as the pain vibrated up his body.

There was no sign of any malicious intent from his green travel companion as he said, "I can heal your injuries Sheppard."

Sheppard eyed him warily and with a hint of incredulity that he would even bring that up again, particularly knowing how he felt about it the first time. He really didn't think he'd ever come to understand the Wraith's thinking process. There was no way he was coming anywhere near him. "Thanks, but I still have nightmares about the last time. So you'll forgive me if I pass on your offer." Armed now with only minimal firepower they had to find a way to bring Kolya out in the open, if not it meant only one thing. They would have to gain entrance to the structure, which was a sure fire way of getting both of them killed. Reaching for his night vision binoculars from his backpack to survey the outbuildings, he realised for the first time that he didn't have them. "Crap!"

"What is wrong?"

"My binoculars. I must've left them in At…" he stopped himself suddenly at the realisation that his Wraith companion still didn't know that he was from Atlantis, and he couldn't risk that knowledge slipping out. It didn't matter whether he trusted him or not, that sort of information if leaked could ultimately get everyone killed, and he wasn't prepared to take that risk. His brow creased with concentration at what to tell his travelling companion. With the toll of the previous days events beginning to catch up with him, he could feel the adrenaline fading away as he tried to focus. In the end, all he could think of was, "I must've lost them when I was in hiding" Stealing a look at the man beside him, he had a decidedly strange feeling that the Wraith didn't believe a word he'd just said, and he didn't blame him.

"We are able to see in the darkness. We do not need looking devices to observe our prey in the night."

_Prey? So that really is how they see us. Nice!_ A chill ran down his spine, and he shivered slightly. "Okay, well that's…different. So how many of them are out there?"

"There are many."

Shepard shook his head at the Wraiths inability to provide intel. It wasn't just a case of a handful of men as he'd anticipated; that was clear from the onset as raised voices could be heard coming from the direction of the dilapidated outbuildings. Guards could be seen visibly patrolling the parameter as the two men watched cautiously from a distance.

As the Wraith went to stand and begin the assault, John laid a restraining hand on his forearm to stop him giving away their position, "Whoa there Kimosabe. I appreciate your enthusiasm, but don't you think we should at least pretend to give this more than a minutes thought before we go barging in?"

"Why?" It was a simple enough question.

He shrugged, "Well, as strange as it sounds I actually enjoy living, although after everything that's happened, I'm sure there would be some who'd disagree." At that point, Sheppard thought that he wasn't the only one with issues. He remembered a saying from the 'Princess bride', and thought it applied quite aptly to their current situation. "Did you know that you've got an overdeveloped sense of vengeance? And it's going to get us into trouble someday."

"I believe that the depiction also applies to you, does it not?" He watched for a response, but none was forthcoming, so he continued, "A Wraith attacks without fear of consequence. It was my belief that this was the reason you came. You should not be here if you are not prepared to accept that. You should also know that I am prepared to die in battle alongside you."

He frowned, dying wasn't exactly on the top of his agenda, "That's nice. But if it's all the same to you, I'd rather not. Besides, I've still got at least 100 chapters to read of War and Peace." The Wraith held a confused expression before proceeding to ask what 'War and Peace' was, Sheppard shook his head in a don't-even-ask-me-to-explain sort of way; they'd be there all night. "Now we've got our mortality issues out of the way, is there any chance we can put together some sort of a plan that will hopefully not result in one or both of us getting killed?"

"As you wish. However I do not see how you will be able to continue with your injuries, if you will not allow me to heal them for you."

He shook his head tiredly; a hint of disbelief at the Wraith's tenacity played on his lips. "As I said before, I'll manage." But as the words fell precariously from his lips, the deepest and darkest part of his mind was under no illusions that this mission was likely to end badly. This really wasn't a very good plan. His friends had been right from the start. He closed his eyes in pain, and tried to force the constant exploding of pain from his thigh, to the back of his mind. "I just need to rest for a minute."

The facts that Shepard had no reservations about resting while his partner in crime stood watching, spoke volumes about their now indefinable friendship. He couldn't explain why he knew he could trust him; just that it was an inbuilt mechanism from survival training. If they were to take their plan to the next level he had to trust him implicitly and scarily enough, he did.

* * *

"Oh no!"

McKay's gaze was transfixed onto the scanner that he converted from the Queen's schematics. The pit of his stomach recoiled once more at the image displayed in front of him. The large Atlantean read out showed all too clearly what he hoped was just an error, but he was deluding himself.

"What's wrong now? I thought we were all ready to head out?" Ronon was the first to speak as he leant forward trying to understand the series of blue dots floating on the screen. "What's that?" He asked pointing to a large image on the view screen.

"They are darts. And that…" he told them pointing to the larger dot, "…is a Wraith hive ship." Zelenka told him with slight trepidation. He looked towards his colleague with an apologetic look in his blue eyes.

"How far away are they from the planet." Weir asked taking in a deep breath as they huddled around the control rooms display unit. She crossed her arms defensibly at the decision she would have to make.

"By my calculations, it'll be there within the next 12 hours or so." McKay told them solemnly placing the data pad to one side.

"Then let's go now." Ronon was under no illusions that this was going to get very serious, very quickly, but he was more than prepared to take the risk.

"Hold on Ronon, this changes the whole ball game." She had to say it; they needed to know what they were getting themselves into, warts and all. "You do realise don't you, that you could be going into a fire fight."

Teyla reflected on her words, but she wanted the leader of the Atlantean expedition to know that they all accepted the ramifications of their actions, and now it was time to take a stand in something they believed in. "Elizabeth, we understand the risks, but it is something we need to do. Each of us feels partly responsible for what has happened, and if we had come to you and Dr Beckett with our concerns, maybe none of this would be necessary. The truth is, we were all well aware of how the Colonel was feeling, and to a degree we did encourage it. It is now up to us to amend the errors we made. Please allow us to do this."

They couldn't have said it better if they tried. Each of them looked imploringly at Doctor Weir, they wore their hearts on their sleeve each of them – even Ronon. When they had first come to Atlantis, this had been her hope that they would one day work together as one, and find a common goal to unite them all, and they had. She felt a surreal amount of pride as she eyed them all individually; it showed her just how far they were willing to go to save one of their own. An unspeakable bond was surrounding her, and in all good conscience she couldn't turn around and say no. But before she had the opportunity to speak. Ronon, who was normally the quietest one of all, spoke directly from his heart.

"Sheppard came after me on Sateda. Even though I told him I didn't want his help, he wouldn't leave. When I was a runner, I only had myself to rely on, but since being here with you all, I've learned many things about being able to depend on someone else. Look, I know I'm not very good at saying what I mean, but going after Sheppard is important to me."

"Us." The group corrected in unison, causing them to smile shyly at each other.

"Elizabeth," Rodney cut in, "I can take the necessary precautions. We can cloak the jumper and scan for his life signs when we get to the other side. We'll be in and out before the Wraith step foot on the planet. But, if we're going to do it, we have to do it now."

She'd heard enough, and gave her blessings. "Go, just make sure you take a team of marines with you, just in case you run into any trouble."

They didn't need for her to tell them twice. They turned to thank her, but it really wasn't necessary. A smile said a thousand words as they hurriedly made their way to the jumper bay.

A whisper of Good luck ushered from her lips as she watched them depart, maybe for the last time, maybe not. Either way she knew that they wouldn't give up until they found him.

* * *

"Sheppard!"

Waking up with a start, he visibly flinched as he came within an inch of the Wraith's face peering over him as he slept. His heart leaped into his mouth for a split second as he vividly recalled the memory of the last time he'd been inches from his face. And to say it was less than pleasant was an understatement. Shaking his head he retorted, "You know I really wish you wouldn't do that." he hadn't realised that several hours had passed since he was injured. As it now turned out, the sun on the planet appeared to be rising once more, allowing sunlight to filter through the trees. He absently rubbed his eyes and tried to focus his vision.

"Look!" The Wraith stated sombrely, pointing to a figure walking towards the derelict building.

Sheppard turned towards the direction of a figure huddled around his men. His dirty brown uniform was visible confirmation that it wasn't a delusion. "Kolya!" Sora was right; he was here. Sheppard felt of rush of blood circulating round his body as he leaned in for a closer look. Ignoring the pain emanating from his thigh, he laid his body down on the moist grass and shimmied forward, as if not quite sure if his eyes betrayed him. Flashbacks of being shackled to the wooden chair tore through his brain like a hot knife. Unconsciously he laid a hand on his chest where the feeding mark was still evident. Built up emotions threatened to overwhelm him; he had to focus. Uncoiling his white knuckled hands, he slowed his breathing somewhat in an attempt to gain some composure. The burning sensation coursing through his veins was uncompromising, and he felt his blood pressure rising once more.

He tried to hear what was being said, but it was too far away. Edging closer, but still remaining undiscovered, he inched forward on his stomach keeping as low as he possibly could. This was the perfect opportunity to get him while he was out in the open. A cold steely gaze flashed within his almond shaped hazel eyes as he reached for his weapon. The only sound he could hear was the rushing of blood circulating round his system. His heart pounded in his ears as he raised his weapon at his intended target. An erroneous thought flickered through his mind – this was murder; whatever way he looked at it. This wasn't him defending himself, his team or Atlantis against the enemy; this was an assassination. There really was no dressing up that fact. But that niggling sensation kept assaulting his mind, telling him that it was time for payback! He shook his head to rid himself of the negative thoughts, but it wouldn't leave him alone. His own conscience played on him. _Think about what you're doing. This isn't you. You'll never forgive yourself if you do this._ He wasn't paying them any mind until his conscience stated unequivocally, _this is what a Wraith would do. _That single thought stopped him dead in his tracks and he relaxed his hold on the P-90. He looked over to the Wraith lying not too far from him, waiting with anticipation to strike as soon as the bullets left the chamber. His blood boiled, as all rational thought escaped him, and he returned his concentration to the gun in his hand. Bringing up the weapon back up to his line of sight, he replaced his finger back on the trigger, preparing to fire.

Kolya, filled with rage at the attack of his men, shouted his standing orders at his men. "I don't care what it takes, bring them to me. I want them alive. Do you understand? I want you to recall the troops and have them surround the area, he can't be far." His men coward at the harshness in their commander's voice, but nodded their head in compliance before heading out towards the clearing and towards the Wraith and Sheppard's location. Kolya felt like someone had walked over his grave, as cold shivers tingled down his spine; he stiffened. Someone was watching him. Years of experience had taught him to be vigilant, and today was no exception. He turned around as he felt eyes boring into his soul, then he caught a glimpse of the morning sun reflecting off what appeared to be an optical sight. He dived out of the way, barking orders at everyone to catch the elusive men that had killed several of his people.

Not more than 100 feet from their target, Sheppard watched as his intended victim caught sight of his scope in the sunlight. Then a flurry of activity took hold by the structures as the Genii advanced onto their position. He fired his weapon, managing to take a few down in the process. _Crap!_ "Go!" but the Wraith didn't. Instead he advanced onto the Genii like a predator who had been starved for years. Sheppard couldn't let him go it alone.

It was now or never.

As the next few moments unfolded, Sheppard cried out in rage as the Genii opened fire on his companion hitting him squarely in the chest several times, knocking him squarely off his feet. Going down hard, Sheppard could actually feel the vibrations under his feet.

"No!"

The shout tore through his throat, as the Wraith lay on the ground unmoving. Inexplicably, he felt as if a piece of him lay dying alongside the Wraith. That split second of indecisiveness cost him dearly. Enraged he opened fire once more, but not before being tackled dramatically to the ground by several Genii soldiers.

It was over even before it had begun.

The worst of it was, Kolya was still alive. He struggled against his captors to get to his friend, but it was a futile gesture; their grip was unyielding, but so was he. Attempting to tear from their grasp, he felt a blow to the back of his head and he fell forward onto the grassy knoll. His vision became distorted as the world went from gray to black, and that was the last thing he remembered. His friend was dead, and he was about to join him in that same fate.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

_"When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us." _

_

* * *

_

The jumper exited the vortex at high velocity and cloaked within a split second of entering the planet. The gate appeared to be unguarded for the moment. As the Lantean ship soared through the air, McKay activated the HUD, and spotted several Genii converging on their position.

"McKay!"

"You know shouting doesn't help!" His hand gripped the controls so hard his knuckles began turning white. Keeping his vision on the landscape below, McKay checked the readout in front of him. His voice raised an octave, as the nerves began settling in. "How many did you count?"

"Roughly 30 that I saw, but they were heading away from the gate. There's nothing we can do about it for now," Ronon stated uneasily, "I'll try the radio, you just concentrate on flying. The last thing we need is for you to crash this thing." Ronon advised him, switching on the walkie-talkie.

"Hey! I take offence at that, there's nothing wrong with my flying."

"Shut up and watch what you're doing," Ronon wasn't in any mood for any of McKay's whining. Usually Sheppard was around to keep him in line, but since they found out he was missing, McKay had pain a pain in the ass. He tried the radio, but only received radio static. _Great, just great!_

Something towards Teyla's left caught her vision. "Over there, by the tree line, isn't that the colonel's jumper? But it looks…" she didn't want to finish her sentence. A gust of wind flowed through the trees as the craft headed towards the forest where previous plumes of smoke had now extinguished and all that was now evident, was debris scattered across the ground. "Do you think we are too late?"

"Hey! I thought I was supposed to be Mr Negativity around here?" It was a short sharp shock to the system to see one of their puddle jumpers mangled, and probably beyond repair. But what had hit them the hardest was the fact that McKay wasn't able to discern and life signs coming from the wreckage. "Lets just keep our eyes out for Sheppard, his subcutaneous transmitter should still be broadcasting, so I'm not giving up just yet."

"Rodney, I did not mean anything by it." Teyla tried to reassure her friend, but by the stoic determination on his face, she didn't think he was listening.

"McKay do a quick survey of the area by Sheppard's puddle jumper, if we're not alone, then I'd prefer to know now rather than later." With that Ronon pulled his weapon out of its holster and set it to kill, this time he wasn't taking any chances.

McKay, checking on the HUD noted that there didn't appear to be anyone near their vicinity. From what he could ascertain the only discernable life signs seemed to be congregating around several structures several miles from their location. It was an area they planned to check out immediately after the team inspected the crashed jumper. There was still a chance, albeit a small one that he was there and still alive. But seeing the mangled wreckage of the jumper and the fact that his subcutaneous transmitter wasn't activating, he wasn't optimistic. "We're good to go." McKay stated, landing the jumper with some reservation. He wasn't so sure if he wanted to know what was or wasn't inside the jumper. If they found him dead, he'd never forgive himself at losing one of his closest friends, and it would be all his fault.

Maintaining the cloak on the jumper they watched the ramp descend and headed out, cautiously eyeing their surroundings. The jumper was a mess. Hot twisted metal leading into the cockpit was their first discovery, followed by the stench of smoke that infiltrated their senses. For a moment they took in the carnage, bits of smashed consoles littered the floor of the ship where it had impacted onto the ground like a lead weight. As they moved towards the front of the cockpit, with weapons raised at the ready, Teyla was the first to spot it; dried blood coated the panels.

"That's a good sign." Ronon told them with hopefulness that Sheppard had made it out in one piece.

"Are you kidding me?" McKay retorted acerbically; for once not afraid to show his anger towards the former runner. The more anxious he got, the faster the words came out. "Hello? The ship _is_ buckled, and will probably never fly again. The drive pods are shot to hell, and oh yes, have you seen the blood? How the hell can that be a good sign? Have you _ever_ known the ship to end up like this even after the times we've crashed?"

"Do you see a dead body? Because I sure as hell don't. So yes, I'd say it's a good sign. You got a problem with that McKay?" The tall Satedan stood face-to-face daring the man to disagree with his assertion of the facts as he saw it. For a brief moment, silence ensued as both men allowed their emotions to cloud their friendship. It had always been that way, and today was no different. McKay, as Ronon was well aware wore his heart on his sleeve. When aggrieved he became confrontational, allowing the fear to surface, especially when that fear involved losing a friend. He however, was the polar opposite. Years spent on the run from the Wraith had taught him to shield his emotions, never allowing anyone to see past the mask that he so prominently displayed when faced with adversity.

McKay couldn't help himself. As time passed, he was becoming despondent, several hours has passed and they were still no further forward in finding their friend. Anxiousness had now become his companion as he looked around the cockpit, trying to salvage some kind of hope that his instincts were wrong. His friend was alone, vulnerable and injured on a hostile planet because of his actions, so of course he had a problem with that. "What the hell are you yelling at me for? I wasn't the one who had the death wish, and then decided to disobey orders, steal a jumper _and_ crash it into the nearest tree."

Squeezing past them, Carson ignored their backbiting; he'd seen and heard it all before. At the moment, he was more concerned with how much blood loss was evident. After studying the volume of blood dripped over the consoles and onto the floor he pointed out something, "Given the quantity of blood here, it's more than likely he just hit his head. It makes sense given the state of the jumper. Besides I certainly can't see any signs of exsanguination."

Rodney was disgusted at the reference. "Ew! I can't believe that even popped into your head."

Turning to face him, Beckett frowned before giving as good as he got, "I'm a medical doctor, Rodney what the bloody hell did you think I'd be looking for? And if you must know, it also means that I agree with Ronon's assessment of the situation; it's a good sign."

"Yes, getting fed upon again is infinitely better than being dead!" A shocked expression washed over him. As soon as the words left his mouth he regretted them. "I'm sorry, that didn't come out the way I intended." He wasn't used to apologising, even to his friends, but the words had cut through the atmosphere like a knife, and he didn't know how to take them back.

The worrying thing was, he was right to some degree in that their worst fears would be realised once more. It was in the back of all their minds that there was a possibility that Sheppard could be seriously injured or worse, but none of them dared say it out loud, except for McKay. He was good at many things, but keeping his mouth shut wasn't one of them. Each of them shook their heads at his lack of diplomatic skills.

Ronon scowled, but Carson was the first to admonish him, "Rodney."

McKay looked at them sheepishly, "What? I told you I was sorry. You know this never would have happened if…"

Teyla didn't let him finish, she was becoming exasperated with them all, and told them so in no uncertain terms. "Can we please put our differences aside and concentrate on the problem? At least we have to some degree established that the colonel might be sill alive, but injured. Is it possible that we could actually try and find him, instead of behaving like children? As I am sure you are all well aware, the Wraith are due here within the next few hours, and I for one do not relish being here when that happens, so can we?" she finished, indicating that they should make their way out of the jumper. She wished the colonel were here to keep them all in line. One thing she had noticed since she had allied herself with them, was that whether John Sheppard knew it or not, he was the glue that bound the team together, and without him, they felt lost.

"Let's just head back to the jumper and scout for him from the air." It was a good plan; in fact it was their only plan. But if they didn't find their team mate soon, there was no way they would be able to take on a hive ship, not by any stretch of the imagination. Which meant only one thing; Sheppard could be left to face them alone.

End of part ix

AN: Thank you for your kind reviews :o)


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"_**Democracy is the art of thinking independently together**__**"**_

* * *

An unsettling sensation washed over his mind, as he struggled to remember what had hit him. Clawing up from the slumbers of the deep, he had difficulty focusing on where he was and how he'd got there. It certainly didn't feel as if he were lying in his bed in Atlantis, or finding himself in the infirmary after being severely injured. There wasn't the normal antiseptic smell that he associated with waking up there. But something was familiar; he just couldn't put his finger on it. As the fog began to lift, his memories began seeping back like a trickle of water flowing through an obstructed stream until it began gathering momentum; then it him like a bolt out of the blue. The musty dank smell that filtered through his nostrils assaulting his senses was his first clue that not everything was as it seemed. His second; lying on a stone cold floor with aches and pains culminating from being battered around in the jumper and then shot at - not to mention the lovely bump beginning to form at the base of his skill. He gingerly opened his eyes, partly out of apprehension, but also from the pounding in his head. He didn't know how long he'd been out of it, but it was certainly long enough to cause his body to stiffen. Closing his eyes once more, he tried to take it all in. Everything he'd tried to do up to this point had been for nothing, and he'd just about had enough. Waking up in a jail cell was all too reminiscent of the last, and if this was how his finally days were to end, then so be it. He was just about past the point of caring. Berating himself inwardly for the negative thoughts, he let out a slow releasing breath to calm the dark thought from building up inside him.

The last thing he remembered was the Wraith being gunned down in front of him, with Kolya standing laughing; as if it to him it was and always had been just a game of cat and mouse. Kolya! He sat up sharply, then wished he hadn't as the room swayed slightly from getting up too fast. Bile rose in the back of his throat, and his stomach felt hollow; like a black pit of emptiness gorging on nothing but bad memories at seeing his companion killed before his very eyes. He'd alienated his family, probably lost his career and killed a friend. And what did he have to show for his efforts? Nothing. Kolya was still alive, taunting him as he'd so frequently done before and he was going to be left to rot in a stinking jail cell and all because of his self-inflicted obsession. _Good one, John! You had him in your sight, and you let him slip right through your fingers_. Bringing his hands up to cup his face, he felt a cold metal band tied to his wrists and his legs. If he'd any plans of getting the hell out of there, it was cut short in its prime. The chains clunked together as he tried to pry the shackles from the wall. It was more out of something to do as opposed to being realistic about his current situation. Nothing he did seemed to work, so he tried it again, harder this time until jagged metal edges began digging into his wrists causing tiny welts of blood to slick the restraints that detained him.

Negative thoughts and fears entered his head; this was a really bad plan. _That's the understatement of the year!_ The foreboding, damp prison cell was all too similar to the last one, and the odour was overpowering; obviously sanitation was at the bottom of the Genii's list. As he shuffled his body back to lean on the slimey brick wall, he rubbed his eyes tiredly then allowed his fingers to massage the bridge of his noes as in an effort to erase the headach that blurred his vision. Shadows of light danced in hallway, as his eyes grew accustomed to the darkness. Looking down by his legs, something caught his vision, his heart pounded in his chest; beads of sweat surfaced on his forehead as the resident creatures found their way into his cell. If he stayed here for much longer, the Genii wouldn't have a need to kill him, the bugs scuttling across the floor would do it for them. God he hated bugs, none more so than the alien variety. This was not the way he wanted to end his final days. John shivered involuntarily - _Damn bugs!_ Stomping hard on what looked to be a large cockroach type of insect moving towards him, Sheppard was certain it had a glint in his eyes, apparently sizing up its next meal. _I don't think so!_ Crushing it vigorously with both feet, he sorted that problem out quick enough as the bug's outer casing crunched under the weight over his boots. He cringed at the mental image that it left behind; he was definitely going to be sleeping with one eye on the ground tonight. He brought his hands up, gingerly running them through his tousled hair, carefully ensuring not to disturb the clotting wound on his forehead. He was just having a bad day, a really bad and completely crappy day. But, as someone once told him, it was always darkest before the Dawn. He still had a job to do, and he relied on that thought to keep him from going nuts in the all too familiar hellhole he found himself in.

Reminiscing of the times he'd spent enslaved, he could count on one hand; this would make it his third stint if he remembered correctly, and it wasn't exactly difficult given the circumstances of each and every incarceration. The first, being thrown into an Afghan jail, just outside Kandahar by some Taliban who just didn't seem to appreciate his reasons for being there. Held up for weeks in a prison not too dissimilar to this one, the only difference was, it didn't have any alien bugs that felt the need to siphon his life force and latch themselves to his neck. Instead, the bugs indigenous to Afghan prisons seemed to be venomous spiders and sand flies that had burrowed in his skin, which had laid him up for months after the bites became infected. He wasn't even going to think about the body lice - just the thought about it made him scratch, and that was just what he had to contend with in his cell. It didn't even compare to the interrogation techniques that he'd been forced to endure on a daily basis. If it hadn't been for an extraction team, he wondered if he would've been left to fend for himself. He bowed his head in reflective silence at the memory. It wouldn't have been so bad if Holland had made it, but he hadn't and he didn't want to dwell on that fact; it was still too raw and painful to even think about it. Recalling the memory of only a week ago, he raised his hand unconsciously to his chest, the feeding mark now only just beginning to fade. He scrunched his eyes closed and tried to shake of the feeling that his only purpose in life was to end up rotting in a place like this.

He tried pulling on the metal chains one more time, but all they did was cut more into his wrists, he shouted out in frustration, "Damn it!"

"Do not waste your energy Sheppard."

For a moment the voice startled him, he thought he'd been alone all this time. He turned as far as he could and tried to peer into the shadows; his eyes barely made out a shadowy figure lying supine across the other side of the room. Instinctively he knew who it was. It was clear that his companion was gravely injured. There was none of the power in his voice that had been so constant on the surface. Given that he'd seen the man fall to the ground, his body riddled with gunshots, he was surprised, and bizarrely pleased that the man was still alive and that he was no longer alone. "Are you okay?"

"No."

_Okay, well that was succinct. _"Care to elaborate?" he asked, not only out of concern, but he also needed to know if the man was in any fit state to try and make a break for it, if or when the time came; a flicker of hope crept into his mind.

"I am dying."

He let the words sink in, before trying to think of something positive to say, not just for the Wraith's peace of mind, but also for his own sanity. And although not strictly peppy, he wasn't prepared for the Wraith to give up just yet. "What-have-I-told-you-about-being-negative? I'm not having any of that dying crap. We've been in the same situation before and got out alive, and we'll damn well do it again." The Wraith didn't reply. Sheppard waited for some sign of acknowledgement, but none was forthcoming.

Things seemed to be going from bad to worse. He could hear laboured heavy breathing coming from the adjacent wall, and it really hit home just how badly injured the Wraith was. He tried to make his way over to where he was lying; he needed to see for himself just how badly hurt his companion was, but his efforts were wasted – he was going nowhere. The sweat and dirt embedded in his bloodied thigh burned as he tried to move nearer and the restraints tied to his wrists made it damn near impossible to move more than a few feet. Gritting his teeth against the pain he tried to shrug it off, but it was becoming damn near impossible, what he wouldn't give right now for a shot of morphine. He had to concentrate on a viable plan to get them out of there, and fast; time was running out. He closed his tired eyes and felt a heavy weight settling on his chest from mixed emotions. They were trapped, helpless and alone; he could do no more, but sit and wait in the silence until his executioner came, or by some miracle his team. Given the time that had elapsed since he'd left Atlantis it now seemed highly unlikely. He drifted off, half in and out of consciousness, he desperately needed to sleep, but now wasn't the time or place and he kept forcing himself to stay awake. He ignored his bodies craving for the much-needed rest and it was only the thoughts of what was to come that staved off the exhaustion. He didn't know how much time had passed, but he didn't have to wait for very long until he became aware of the vibrations on the ground.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

Heavy footsteps echoed onto the stone floor, and Sheppard realised that they were having company. The lights to their jail cell flickered on, only slightly illuminating their current confine, but it was enough to make out whom their visitor was. The keys rustled in the metal lock, and then the door swung open revealing a willowy figure stepping forward with a wry grin on his face. Sheppard was as ready as he was ever going to get.

"Colonel Sheppard, I must say, to see you like this is something of a surprise." Kolya had noted his appearance almost immediately on his capture and was more than surprised to see the ageing of the man reversed. It piqued his curiosity in more ways than one, and planned to ensure that he received the answers on how he had attained his youthful appearance once more – it definitely deserved more study.

Raw emotions rose to the surface; he detested this man with a passion. As his voice grew darker, he wanted nothing more than to wipe the snide smile from his captors face. "What can I say, I age gracefully. Look, Kolya let's cut to the chase shall we? Whatever the hell you're planning, I suggest you do it now before I get the opportunity to do just what I said I would. And believe me, this time I won't hesitate." It wasn't a blasé statement, he meant every word; each point enunciated so that his message was heard loud and clear.

Kolya's expression exuded an air of superiority, "I like your confidence. But given your current position, I find it highly unlikely that even the redoubtable Colonel John Sheppard could escape this time. So would you like to explain first why you are here and how you found me? And secondly, how the aging process was reversed." Sheppard remained silent, "Or will it be necessary to release the Wraith from its bindings once more? Given its state of ill-health, I'm sure it would relish the opportunity to finish what it started."

Sheppard bit back, his acerbic sarcastic wit was now flowing with animosity, "Things have changed, Kolya, but you go right ahead and see what you get for your efforts. I would have thought that killing several of your inept guards the last time we took you on was enough to show you that. Or maybe you just need another demonstration?" he eyed the guards who had manhandled him. Speaking with complete sincerity, his eyes burning with anger he finished, "And believe me, I'm more than happy to oblige."

"That may well have been the case on our previous encounter, colonel, but I think you'll find that the creature has a lot more to lose this time. It's interesting the things I have learned regarding the Wraith, and of your culture. I have found that to truly know your enemy it's important to study their past. I must say, your world has some colorful literature. Were you aware that I traded some supplies to gain access to some of your world's history and works of fiction, which I understand you gave to the Ka'Tarian people as barter? I found one particular story remarkably fitting. Do you know the fable of the scorpion and the frog?"

He remembered the Ka'Tarians, Teyla had introduced them to him months ago, and given their lack of reading material, she had thought it appropriate to give the children of the planet something quite different. John looked at him nonchalantly, he had no idea what bearing this had on anything, but given Kolya's own nature it wasn't surprising that he would refer to that particular one. It didn't matter though; he knew the Wraith wouldn't betray him, no matter what the cost.

The guard brought in a chair for their commander to sit on, knowing full well neither prisoner could break free from their restraints. The interrogation was only just beginning; his actions were meticulous and commanding as he relayed the fable, "You see, this scorpion asks the frog to help him cross the river. However, due to its deadly nature the frog is naturally cautious, and fears being bitten and subsequently killed. The scorpion reassures him, saying that he would never do such a thing, and needs his help to continue his journey."

"I know the story, Kolya. Do you have a point to all of this?" He was growing impatient and was more than aware of just where the Genii commander was heading.

Kolya ignored him; he wanted the man to hear the fable loud and clear, as it bore a direct correlation to the young soldiers' current standing. "You see, after agreeing to help the scorpion, they swam across the river together until the scorpion inexplicably stung the frog. When asked why did you do that, now we will both die. The scorpion simply replied… it is just my nature. So you see, colonel, I am fully aware of the Wraith's natural instincts, more so than you it seems." His calculating smile was now firmly in place as he leaned forward towards his captive audience, "And you seem to forget that I have been his master for several years, and he _will_ do as I say, no matter what bond you believe you have developed."

_Okay, if that's the way you want it, two can play at that game. _His dry sense of humour came out in full force, "Interesting. So what you're actually saying is you're the frog, oh and by the way I can definitely see the resemblance – cold, slimy, and my personal favourite - hides from its predators. So that in effect would make me the scorpion," and with that, Sheppard ended with a noxious smile, making his last point crystal clear, "And believe me, my sting can be very deadly."

Pushing his chair out of the way, Kolya got within several feet of him as if daring him to make a move. "Very clever analogy, colonel, but you forget your place. I am not the one chained to a wall with a dying Wraith close at hand. I can assure you no one will be able to help you this time."

Even though he wasn't sure if Elizabeth had given the go-ahead for his friends to come looking for him, his words were resolute, "Don't bet on it."

A dark deep filled hatred burned behind his chocolate brown eyes, as he leaned in closer, "When we last met I assured you it wasn't personal, this time it is. By the time I'm finished I will make you beg for mercy, and you will wish you had never returned."

Sheppard stood his ground, "You just keep telling yourself that."

A dark smirk befell his features as he told him with the utmost sincerity, "Oh don't you worry, colonel, I will." With that the Genii commander walked away, his taut posture revealing that he was also prepared to do what it takes to attain the answers he desired.

The jail door grinded along its metallic rails slamming shut behind him; he would leave the young dark haired soldier to contemplate his demise.

The colonel stole a look across the dingy cell, the Wraith hadn't moved from his original position. He called out to him, hoping that he would answer. Scraped boots shifted on the concrete floor, which was always a good sign, it meant that at least he was still alive. But for how long was anyone's guess. "Hey! You still with us?"

Three words escaped from his lips, "He is right."

_Okay, I really didn't need to know that._ And since their whole endeavour started, he felt uneasy at his friend's choice of words. Trying to act as nonchalantly as possible, he shifted his position to look the man directly in the eyes; he needed to know one way or another whether the Wraith had now gone from ally to foe. And he was dreading the answer, "Which part?"

For the first time since Sheppard woke up, he watched as the Wraith attempted to sit up. "We are alone."

Sheppard smiled reflectively, relief clearly showing in his expressive hazel eyes. He knew he wasn't wrong about him. "Look, I know we're in a bit of a jam at the moment, but it's nothing that we haven't faced before."

"My wounds are deep," he stated as a matter of fact. "I have not fed in some time, and you to are injured." With concerted effort, he inched towards the young man, yanking the chains along the dusty floor, until the two of them were almost side-by-side. "What of your friends? Will they not be coming for you as they did the last time?"

"I don't know," it was a truthful answer, one that he'd been contemplating since he woke up. "I didn't exactly leave on good terms," he replied wistfully, thinking back to his conversation with his team.

The Wraith lowered his eyes as if contemplating a part of his past, "They would not abandon you. This much I know."

He lifted his eyebrows at the revelation, letting out a sardonic laugh, "I told them I didn't want their help. And I have to say; I'm starting to regret those words. I was pretty angry with them," he never was one to share his feelings; it was an inbuilt safety mechanism to stop from getting hurt. With the Wraith it was different, he had a feeling that he just might comprehend what was going on in that head of his when no one else seemed to, "it's just…they didn't understand."

Nodding his head in acknowledgement, he told him truthfully, "I to have struggled to return home since our meeting. For years I dreamt of a life outside the confines of these walls - to be returned to my kind. You are fortunate to have your friends. No one came for me."

Sheppard looked on sadly, he was right. His friends had always been there for him in the past, but he'd recently lost sight of that. Even though his bizarre actions had cost him dearly, he knew that his team would be there for him in his time of need. Their eyes locked. For the first time since awakening his species, he actually began to feel pity for him. Outcast amongst his peers and family with no chance of reconciliation, he felt a connection with him go deeper than it ever had with his own family. He struggled to find the words to ease his burden, "I'm sorry."

Staring into the pilots' concerned features, a look of resignation overtook him; he was dying. And if the soldier had any chance of survival he had to leave him behind. "When you find a way to escape, John Sheppard there is one thing I want you to do for me."

_When 'you' find a way to escape? _John didn't like the sound of that. He made it sound as if he was giving up without a fight. They'd come too far to give up now, and he wasn't prepared to leave him behind; he corrected him, "When _we_ escape."

He shook his head sombrely; "You must continue your quest alone."

"No!" he stood up sharply ignoring the protesting pain in his leg. He could feel the blood trickle down his thigh, but he ignored it. "I'm not leaving you to die in this place." He paced back and forth as much as his confines would allow, it felt slightly reminiscent of the last time they were together at the mercy of Kolya. There was only one way he could think of to keep his friend alive, but it would mean placing all his trust in him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11 **

**"_You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough."_**

* * *

Ronon hated this, he'd rather be doing anything else than sitting and waiting for some sign that Sheppard was on the planet. For all he knew, the Genii could have 'gated him off world, and they'd be none the wiser. He was growing impatient as minutes began turning into hours. Although he didn't mean to direct his anger at McKay, that's how it came out, "Anything?"

McKay's stress levels started to spike. His feisty reply spat out like lava flowing from an erupting volcano, "Yes actually, I found him an hour ago. I just thought I needed the flying practice. So for the last 2 hours, I've been wasting precious time for no good reason other than to piss-you-off." Refusing to look directly at the former runner, he continued checking the HUD for any signs of the subcutaneous transmitter. It felt as if they'd been searching for an eternity, and still nothing. The only life signs they had been able to detect so far had been from the Genii. They were running out of time, and it was frustrating the hell out of him. He'd never felt so helpless. Usually he was the one that saved the day with some brilliant and obscure idea. But so far, he'd come up empty and he wasn't exactly dealing with his failure very well.

Beckett scowled at him from the co-pilot's seat. He had to physically stop himself from leaning across and slapping the man across the back of his head. The colonel had always told him that it worked for him, and that when Rodney 'went off on one', so to speak, he should give it a try. But he didn't think now was the time or place though. The scientist appeared stressed enough as it was, and it would only be counter-productive in reprimanding him. Nevertheless, the man needed to be reminded that he wasn't the only one who was concerned. His Scottish accent came thick and fast, "Don't get on ye' high horse, Rodney. We're just as worried as you are, and snapping at us isn't going to find the colonel any quicker."

The vein in his temple protruded slightly and his face become flushed. Droplets of perspiration converged on his forehead as his blood pressure began to rise. "Well stop asking me stupid questions then. It's not as if I have a secret agenda or anything. When I know something you'll know something." It wasn't as if he had any experience in this sort of thing, he normally left that up to Sheppard. Doing this was not something he'd signed up to when he joined the Atlantis expedition, and he didn't do very well when it came to life and death situations. Give him some complex equation to solve, and he'd do it in a heartbeat, but this was something completely new to him and it scared him more than he cared to admit. Although he'd come a long way in the last few years with regards to his tactical training, he was ultimately just a scientist.

Leaning forward, Ronon peered uncertainly at the readouts, "Are you sure you're using that thing right?"

_I swear there's nothing worse than a backseat driver! _McKay could feel the tension building up inside him. "I'm-doing-the-best-I-can. So why don't you do us all a favour and save your energy for…" he stopped short, as if the penny had dropped.

"For what, McKay?" Ronon responded darkly, his eyes narrowing at the scientist.

He clicked his fingers repeatedly, "Shut up a minute I'm thinking."

"Rodney?" Teyla's voice was pressing; it had been several minutes since McKay had spoken. She watched, as he seemed to be inputting complex equations into the jumpers control system.

Concern and despair turned into hope as he realised why they hadn't been able to locate Sheppard, "Energy waves! I don't know why I didn't think about it earlier. It's brilliant! No wonder we weren't able to get a fix."

Ronon's patience had just expired, "Enough with patting yourself on the back and just get to the point will you, McKay."

Teyla looked perplexed, she had no idea what one had to do with the other. "What do you mean, energy waves? What has that got to do with us finding Colonel Sheppard?"

"I'm talking about Electronic Warfare." McKay grinned like the Cheshire cat in Alice in Wonderland, "What do you do when you're trying to conceal an energy signature?"

"You block the frequency it's being transmitted on." Although Ronon wasn't a scientist he had fought against the Wraith for enough time before joining the Atlantis expedition. As a runner he'd tried numerous times to avoid being detected by his hunters due to his own subcutaneous transmitter signals, but he hadn't had to think as a runner for a long time now; it was both a blessing and a curse. Orphaned, he'd found himself of this family; and in doing so he slowly learned to put the past behind him; but every now and again he'd remember. Sometimes it would be a smell of burning embers that took him back to the culling of his home, other times it would be a word or an action that brought back all his natural instincts as a runner. Idly sitting by, unable to do anything was something he wasn't very good at. His team had been patient with him though, as he slowly adjusted to his new life. But now, being here and knowing what was around the corner stirred his innate survival instincts. This time though, it wasn't to save his life, but that of a friend.

"Exactly! Electronic Warfare is exactly that, the use of directed energy to control the electromagnetic spectrum, which can be used to attack or evade your enemy. The design of electronic warfare comprises of three major subdivisions, I think Kolya is using an electronic field to conceal the transmitter." He couldn't contain his enthusiasm any longer. If this was the case, and the Genii commander was using electronic equipment against them, then all he needed to do was identify the frequency they were using and neutralise it… somehow. He just didn't know how, not yet anyway.

"So, what you're saying is…" Teyla didn't have the opportunity to finish her sentence when McKay went off on a complete tangent once more.

His brain was working overtime, "The use of electromagnetic or directed energy can be used as an effective weapon to neutralize equipment or signals and potentially destroy an enemy that's got energy type weapons; such as the jumper."

Carson shook his head not following, "What the bloody hell are you talking about?"

"Well, if you'll let me finish, I will tell you." McKay's eyebrows lifted as if daring them to speak again until he'd finished what he had to say, "If Kolya's got a device that can sustain this type of energy wave, which I think he has, then he can intercept the jumpers targeting scanners by jamming a specific frequency to protect whatever it is that he's hiding down there, like Sheppard's subcutaneous transmitter. You see it's not dissimilar to a faraday cage."

Teyla had no idea what a 'faraday cage' was, nor was she interested at this given time. Rubbing her eyes tiredly, she tried to fathom what Doctor McKay was essentially saying, "So in essence, we can find Colonel Sheppard by locating this energy weapon? Is that what you are saying?"

"Yes," he smiled like a kid in a candy store.

"That's all you had to say, Rodney instead of blinding us with science," Carson remarked impatiently. "So, all we have to do know is find the source?"

"Again, yes, but we already know where that is," he smiled turning the jumper back round to the Stargate and to the structures they'd located more than a couple of hours ago.

"We do?" They all asked in unison, it was becoming a habit.

McKay bobbed his head from side to side as if not sure how to tell him that he didn't know everything, and that was the only flaw in his idea. "Well, not exactly, but they would need some kind of shelter to conceal all the electronics, and the only sign we've seen of any outbuildings was…"

"…by the crashed jumper." Teyla finally understood.

"Exactly!"

"You mean it's been right under our noses the whole time?" Carson asked frustrated. McKay nodded, and or the first time he didn't know what to say, he felt slightly guilty that he didn't think of it before now.

Teyla calculated how long they'd been searching already, shaking her head she realised that time was slowly running out; it was going to be a long ride back to the gate. She didn't want to be the one to tell them all, but it wasn't as if she had any other options. "Given that it's taken us over two hours to get this far, it's going to be at least that getting back."

Her words left a bitter taste in their mouths. During that time anything could happen; and given Kolya's track record, if he indeed had Sheppard, then it could essentially mean the difference between life and death.

* * *

Sheppard sat down gingerly, his thigh groaning in protest. Although it was only a flesh wound, it didn't mean that it didn't hurt like a son of a bitch. Berating himself, he shook his head in an effort to rid the negative thoughts that had plagued him off and on ever since he arrived on this God forsaken planet. He had to stay focused; no matter what he was feeling, otherwise they'd both end up dead. He'd seen the dangerous smile on Kolya's face and had a bad feeling that this time there was a real possibility that they might not make it out in one piece. That was especially true with regards to his companion, who seemed to be losing the battle. He didn't know much about Wraith or alien physiology, but right now he sure as hell wished he'd listened to Beckett's ramblings about how their genetic makeup worked. One thing he did know for sure was that he could tell when someone was dying in front of his very eyes – regardless of their species.

His mind worked overtime as he tried to think of an alternate plan; one that wouldn't involve taking years off his life, but nothing sprang to mind. He couldn't believe he was even contemplating doing this. After everything that had happened, and everything he'd said…but this was the only way he knew to keep his friend alive, and like he'd told Teyla, he would willingly…well maybe not willingly, but he'd do just about anything to save his friends even if that cost was his very life. Now was no different. Even though he knew that this was the only way, the memories of his past feeding were still evident, and he had the scars to prove it. He ran a hand through his rakish hair as if unconsciously brushing away any last doubts. If there was a time to trust each other, now was it.

The Wraith looked at his young companion with a sorrowful expression, "It is my choice, Sheppard."

"Right! Tell me again how bleeding to death in a stinking jail cell is a good choice?" The Wraith growled angrily at him, but Sheppard had seen and heard it all before, and he was now at the stage where it didn't faze him anymore. "Look, I have a plan; not a great one mind you, but it's all I got. You're dying, and the only way to keep you alive, is for you to…feed." He tilted his head as if forcing the words out, not quite believing that he was actually having this discussion.

_No._ He shook his head emphatically, their alliance was too important to be placed in jeopardy. No matter what his friend was prepared to forfeit, it wasn't worth it - he wasn't worth it. Their unique friendship had taught him that. "You are my friend, Sheppard. I will not sacrifice your life for my own."

"Hey, believe me I've no intention of dying today, not if I can help it. So, if you've got a better idea for getting us out of here, then I'm all ears."

"As I told you before, my wounds are severe. To heal them, it would be necessary to take many years off your life. I cannot guarantee that this time I would be able to restore your life to you as I did before."

"Okay, so that could be a problem," Sheppard replied tentatively, realising that if the Wraith agreed to this, his escape plan could ultimately kill him. Given his choices of dying at the hands of Kolya or the Wraith, he'd rather not choose either. Fate though had decreed that it had to come down to two choices - quick death or slow death and they were all he had. If his team had decided to follow him, then they'd be in with a chance, but as the hours passed slowly and nothing was forthcoming, he'd all but given up on relying on them to bail him out this time.

The Wraith looked directly into his eyes; he couldn't do it, "One that I could not live with."

Sheppard pushed the point, "I know it's a bit risky, but you've stopped yourself before, _and_ you can do it again." He didn't think the Wraith was listening, but this was the only way. It was time to lay his cards on the table, "Listen to me. All I'm saying is that I know the risks and I'm prepared to take that chance. Granted, it's not one of my better plans, but… I trust you."

The Wraith looked on earnestly, this man was his brother in every other sense of the word, more than that, and he was putting his trust in him – something no human had ever done. Not even his own kind would put that sort of faith in another. Closing his eyes in quiet contemplation, he felt torn at the choice that he would ultimately have to make.

Before they had the opportunity to discuss it further, they heard the familiar sounds of heavy footsteps and screeching metal doors echoing in the desolate building. Sheppard wished he'd had a few more minutes alone, but Kolya had now made that impossible as the heavily armed guards made their presence known.

"Well isn't this cosy?"

Kolya's gruff voice grated on Sheppard's ears as the Genii commander entered the cell with six of his men; each armed to the nine's with archaic, but effective weaponry. The lead pellets inside the chambers could easily cut a man in two at close distance. Now was definitely not the time for any heroics, he'd know instinctively when the time would be right to strike, and now wasn't it. It was a natural instinct, borne from years of experience dealing with predators, and Kolya and his men were no exception.

Sheppard cocked his head in defiance, his determined gaze settling on his nemesis, "Come to read us another bedtime story?"

A wry grin escaped from his lips, "As delightful as that sounds, colonel, no. If you must know I want a sample of your DNA."

"I believe there's some over there by the wall, feel free to help yourself." John remarked indicating to their lack of toilet facilities.

"As wonderful as that sounds, colonel, it's your blood I'm after and I'd prefer it fresh if you don't mind."

"Actually I do…mind that is."

"Well, fortunately you don't have a say in the matter." Kolya's mouth twisted into a wry smile, "Move." Without taking his eyes of his prisoner, he ushered the guards to move the Wraith from his path. Their weapons raised in anticipation at the creature striking out as he forced the creature into a standing position. The Wraith looked on as Sheppard bit his bottom lip, his posture revealing that he was prepared for anything.

Sheppard's eyes darted from his companion to the guards, a sense of anticipation settled in his chest; their pain sticks wavering inches from his body. He remembered the sensation the last time, and wasn't in any kind of hurry to repeat the experience. He knew that if the Wraith made a move now; they'd be dead in minutes. The situation was too unpredictable at the moment to do anything but comply; their plan would have to be put on hold for a little while longer.

Once they had sufficiently secured the creature, several armed guards clutched hold of Sheppard, releasing him from the chains on the wall. Forcefully grabbing hold of his forearms, they hauled him off the ground before slamming his body into a chair they'd brought in; Sheppard stiffened in response as his wounds cried out in protest, his face remaining defiant. He'd dealt with Kolya before, and he wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of knowing he was winning. His stoic resignation since his capture was, up until now his only weapon. He held onto the thought as they jarred his head back, causing his head wound to reopen. Leather bindings wrapped tightly around his wrists held him securely in place. Now fully restrained, he watched wide-eyed with trepidation as a lanky man in a grey lab coat appeared at the jail's opening. Vials of colored ampoules sat neatly in their metal containers, he shot a look of disdain at the technician as he proceeded towards him armed with a syringe.

His fists clenched as the needle plunged deep into his veins, he didn't know what to expect this time from Kolya, but so far his threats had been relatively innocuous. He hoped that this was all he wanted from him, but given their chequered past, it seemed highly unlikely.

"That's enough." The authoritative command resonated in the chamber as the technician gathered sufficient samples of the pilots DNA. With a nod towards the tray of medical supplies, Kolya's eyes moved to the red colored vial. Silently the lab technician protested, his eyes betraying a hint of fear and what the commander was insinuating. "Do I need to have someone take your place?" His tone was heavy set, filled with enough malice to ensure obedience.

"No sir." His eyes shifted between the prisoner and Kolya, fear of repercussion settled in his demeanour.

"Then what are you waiting for?"

As the technician approached Sheppard once more, Sheppard tried to back away. The guards preparing for such a measure grasped a hold of his shoulders pinning him to the chair; their finger nails digging in to the man's shoulders. Sheppard's eyes grew wide with uncertainty; this wasn't just a simple blood sample, Kolya was taking things to the next level. His hopes of escape were now falling by the wayside. "What the hell are you playing at, Kolya?"

"You'll see, in time." Was the only response given, his sly smile giving away nothing of his plans. The technician waited for the guards to control the prisoner before he manoeuvred into position, expertly injecting the substance into his jugular. Sheppard hissed in pain as the needle pierced his skin.

Expecting some kind of reaction from the chemical now making its way through his body, Sheppard waited for a few moments; his jaw heavy set with determination as if preparing for anything. But as minutes passed and no reaction was forthcoming his eyes held a questioning gaze. Racking his brain as to the purpose of injecting him with in innocuous substance, he came up empty.

"Leave us." The command was directed solely at the technician.

Hurriedly gathering up his medical equipment, the lab technician bolted out of the jail cell, turning round one last time as he reached the entrance to the cell. Sheppard caught his eye as he stood staring at the prisoners one last time; there was definite fear in them. From what he was able to ascertain during their last encounter, Kolya had made reference to being aware of the bodies' reaction to the feeding, and maybe he'd used his own men to get the answers he needed.

"Now, colonel. Are you going to tell me how your life was restored, or will I need to find ways of persuading you? And let me assure you, colonel, I can come up with some creative ideas."

John's eyebrows rose in a devil may care attitude, "Give it up, Kolya. I'm not going to tell you anything."

"Then you leave me no option." Kolya snapped his fingers at the guards holding the Wraith, motioning them to bring him forward; his eyes darting from his two prisoners, taking in their reaction.

Sheppard remained resolute. Realising what was to come, he involuntarily licked his lips; doubt flickering across his face for a moment. The Wraith wasn't giving anything away. As he drew nearer, Sheppard caught his gaze, holding it for a few minutes as if silently conveying his thoughts - _just do it!_ Holding his breath with uncertainty, he didn't know if the message had gotten through.

"I will give you one last opportunity to tell me, colonel." Defiantly, Sheppard refused to give him anything. With a slight nod of his head, the guards understood their commander's instructions and brought the Wraith forward, pain sticks poised in readiness as they inched him forward towards the Atlantean soldier. Sheppard inhaled deeply, calming his apprehension. Stealing a last look at his friend, the silent message from him came through loud and clear - forgive me. With that, the Wraith's baritone roar shattered the silence as he plunged his hand into Sheppard's chest, forcing his body to react to the foreign substance now coursing through his system.

Convulsing slightly as the searing pain hit him like a lightening bolt; the enzyme tore through him causing his heart rate to increase exponentially. Beads of sweat from the exerted effort pitted his forehead, but he refused to utter a sound; Kolya wouldn't get that pleasure. Anger, fear and regret rushed through his mind as he felt the poison work through his vital organs, aging them in the process. His breaths came in short pants as the Wraith suddenly released its hold. Sheppard could do nothing but gather his remaining strength. Exhausted at the effects of the feeding, he slumped forward in the chair, his eyes closed as consciousness began slipping away from him. The last thing he heard before mercifully passing out was Kolya's self-satisfied voice filling the room, "Don't underestimate me again."

End of Part XI

AN: Thanks everyone for all your reviews they are very much appreciated, hope you're still enjoying it. :o)


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12 **

**"_There can be no friendship without confidence; and no confidence, without integrity"_**

* * *

After a long silent journey back to the settlement, Carson took the reigns flying the cloaked jumper. McKay, for the last hour had been engrossed with the necessary calculations in the hopes of neutralising the electromagnetic field. His hopes were, that it would work, he didn't even want to speculate about the 'what ifs' right now. He had to concentrate on getting the equations and then rescuing Sheppard from whatever hellhole he'd managed to get himself into this time. Knowing his friend as he did, he knew that this time, more so than any other was going to take nothing but a minor miracle to get him back in one piece.

"Rodney," Carson called out, shaking him out of his determined efforts; they'd finally arrived. The compound seemed to be guarded by only a handful of Genii, which meant they were either securing the 'gate or were hidden within the dwellings. And if the latter were the case, then it meant the team would have no idea just how many they would be up against.

"Carson, manoeuvre over to the larger buildings 100 metres to your right. I want to scan it for any anomalous readings." Doing what was requested, he watched as Carson engaged the controls once more placing the jumper into position. "Just hold it steady while I recalibrate the sensors."

"Here?"

"Yes." Within a heartbeat he shook his head, "No, no, no, no."

Still hesitant when it came to any alien technology, a slight panicked feeling washed over him, "What did I do? You told me to keep the bloody thing steady."

Waving his hand he dismissed him off hand, "Relax Carson, you're doing fine."

"What is it?" Teyla asked concerned.

Frowning, he tried to insert the correct algorithms without success, "It's just taking me a few minutes to jam the field."

Never one to mince his words, Ronon told him blatantly, "If you don't do it, Sheppard is screwed."

"Thank you for the pep talk, but for your information I am well aware of what the stakes are, and I don't need reminding. " Turning away, he could feel eyes boring into the back of his head as his nimble fingers expertly input the equations; impatiently they awaited a response.

The team could do nothing, but sit and watch the flurry of activity going on beneath them. Noting the Genii guards walking from one side of the compound to the other, Carson activated the HUD to get a clearer idea of how many they would be dealing with, given there own small numbers; it was staggering. The tan display unit suddenly came to life and there before them was the blue dot, representing their friend within the largest structure. McKay, lifted his head smiling with satisfaction, he had no doubts that he wouldn't be able to do it, well not many. With a look of 'how could you ever doubt me.'

Atlantis's chief medical officer smiled as the subcutaneous transmitter lit up the HUD. Anxiety of how they were going to get him out of the guarded structure rushed to his mind. "What now?" From the readouts there appeared to be numerous soldiers within his vicinity, and it was going to take some creative thinking to get past them all.

Ronon announced with a twinkle in his eye, "Now we get Sheppard. I have an idea. Doc. I need you to land this thing where it's not going to be noticed, but not too far from the encampment." He didn't need to spell out the words; everyone was thinking the same thing.

* * *

Blinking his eyes, he felt as if a truck had hit him. Feeling a presence nearby he tried to lift his body, but ended up just making the pounding in his head worse. Tentatively, he raised his hand to his face and felt the now all too familiar lines of aging. The only positive thing about it was the fact that he was still alive, and hoped he wasn't the only one. The gentle shuffling of feet confirmed the fact, as he saw out of the corner of his eye his companion moving towards him. Making an effort to sit up, he struggled initially; his face grimacing with pain that the feeding had caused. "I told you, you could do it," the croakiness in his voice alarmed him slightly.

"I am sorry." Refusing to look in his direction, the Wraith felt remorse at his actions. It didn't matter that he had his friend's blessing to do what was necessary, he felt repulsed for the first time at feeding on another. Now that the young soldier was awake he could clearly make out the repercussions of his actions, and it disturbed him greatly.

"You did what you I asked you to do, so stop apologising. Did it work?"

"Yes. Thanks to you."

Sheppard didn't know if it was possible for a Wraith to feel self-pity; he'd never given it a second thought of whether the Wraith had the ability to feel emotions or compassion. Now though it seemed as if he was learning a lot about the Wraith. "Don't be getting all sappy on me, we did what we had to. Now all that's left is to take the guards by surprise and get the hell out of here."

The Wraith looked doubtful, one thing he did know, was that when feeding took place, the life-force from the host was depleted severely, "As simple as that?"

"Well, we're alive aren't we? And I can still walk…I hope," he said tentatively; checking his limbs to make sure they were working. Apart from being achy, and a slight tingling sensation from the feeding, he felt relief at the familiar sensation returning to his fingers and toes. "So the plan is, we create a diversion, incapacitate Kolya and then evade all of Kolya's men and head for the surface." Smiling wistfully at the challenge ahead, he had no doubts that this wasn't going to be as easy as he made out. For one thing, Kolya would be expecting them to try and escape or some kind of surprise attack; particularly given what happened the last time. So, for it being easy? Not a chance in hell. But he'd rather die trying than wait to see what the Genii commander had in store for them.

"I admire your strength of resolve, Sheppard. But it may take more than that if we are to succeed. As I said to you before, the Wraith are now fully aware of the inhabitants of this planet. They were already making plans to conquer this world. Although they are my kind, I do not have the influence to provide you with the protection you will surely need."

Sheppard mulled over the serious threat. Given that they could now potentially be dealing with two enemies, the chances of their surviving were sinking fast. He bowed his head in reflective silence at the enormity of the task ahead of them. "How long?"

"I do not know. Time is not on our side, that I am sure of. I suggest that you reserve your strength, for you will need it if we are to succeed."

John nodded in comprehension. It was a strange comfort to hear his ally tell him that he was prepared to stick it out, even if that meant going against his own kind. For now though he was mentally and physically exhausted. The pain from his reopened head wound throbbed mercilessly from the abuse he received early, thankfully the gunshot wound to his thigh had been fairly minor, and the through-and-through bullet seemed to have avoided any major structures. At the moment his only concern was the possibility of infection. Tentatively he felt the area; thankfully it wasn't warm to the touch, which would indicate an infection. He felt a small amount of relief for that small mercy. Rubbing his eyes tiredly, he was fully aware that they were only going to have one chance at this, and they had to make it work. His eyelids dropped heavily as the recent trauma inflicted on his body took hold. Closing his eyes, he thought about what would happen if the Wraith did come. Between the two of them, they wouldn't stand a chance. If this had taught him anything, it was that there was no way in hell he could let Kolya escape a second time.

* * *

Flanked in single file between the buildings, the team watched clandestinely at the soldiers surrounding the entrances to the man made structures. From what they were able to assess with the life signs detector, the majority of Kolya's men appeared to be taking shelter within the buildings, which gave them the element of surprise. Trying to be as covert as possible, McKay's nerves started to get the better of him and clumsily he fell forward knocking into the former runner. Angry eyes bore into him as he tried to regain his footing, he ignored them; it wasn't as if he did it on purpose. Besides, they should all know by now that he wasn't exactly the stealthiest person on the team. He forced a whisper from his lips; "You know it would be really helpful if you let us in on this plan of yours!"

"See those Genii over there? You're going to create a little diversion," Ronon advised him with a straight face. McKay looked on horrified, deeming it the stupidest plan he'd ever heard.

Never one to keep his opinions to himself, he confronted him, his wavering voice shot up an octave, the disbelief reflecting in his words, "Are you nuts? What if they shoot at me?"

Looking directly at the chief scientist, he gave nothing away in his expressions, "That could be a problem, but there's nothing like taking one for the team."

"I sure hope your kidding," McKay studied the runners face for a long time to see if he was serious. It was the most annoying thing about the Satedan, and the main reason he'd never play poker with him; primarily because he could never tell if he was joking or not. His continuous blank look was making him nervous, "Can't we flip a coin?" Seeing the doubtfulness etched on the Satedan, he changed tack, "No? What about, Carson? Why does it have to be me?"

"Because, if things go horribly wrong and you do end up getting shot, at the least the doc will be there to patch you up."

"Please tell me you're kidding?" Looking to the rest of the team for support, he became decidedly jittery, "He is joking, right?"

"Do you really think I'd put your life in danger, McKay?" Not that he didn't enjoy putting the fear of God into McKay on occasions; but he was curiously interested on knowing the answer.

Nervous energy tore through his body. Babbling like a brook, his tone held an air of anxiety, "Well, no, but can I just tell you how bad a plan this is? I don't deal well with torture, or certain death. And given the reputation with the Genii, anything is possible. What if they question me? Did I ever tell you how terrible I am at lying? My eye twitches, and I start…"

"McKay!" Ronon admonished through clenched teeth, his patience exhausted, "Nothing will happen to you as long as you do what I tell you, so stop panicking and start listening."

"Okay, but answer me this, Conan. How the hell are they going to believe that I'm injured? I mean look at me; I'm the perfect picture of health." Rolling his eyes at the incredulous looks his team were giving him, continued his protest on how bad a plan this actually was. "They're never going to fall for it."

Deadpan, Ronon finished, "I could always punch you in the face, make it look more believable?"

"That's not exactly what I had in mind," McKay told him acerbically while his team watched on impatiently as he struggled to make up his mind. Then, with all seriousness in his voice he advised him, "Okay. But for the record, if I die, I'm coming back to haunt you."

Ronon's mouth twitched in humour, but he said nothing. If he'd learned anything about McKay was that for all his complaining, he always seemed to find a way out of most problems, and he didn't believe for one second that he would fail them this time. Advising them of his idea, everyone on the team knew what they had to do, and although McKay still had reservations about the whole plan, he knew that this was the only logical way to get past the guards without alerting the whole of the Genii to their presence. With one last glance behind him he shuffled his feet as if feigning injury; his usual jovial features now held an air of anxiety, partly out of playing the part, but also because of inbuilt fear of being found out.

As the adrenaline worked its way through his body, he felt his legs turning to jelly as he rounded the corner. Taking in a deep shaky breath his came into view of the Genii and let out a meek cry for help, before spectacularly crumbling to a heap on the stony gravel beneath him. Tiny shards of pebbles dug into his ribs and torso and he tried not to shift his body against the uncomfortable sensations that they were creating. If this was to work, he had to make it look realistic as possible, and just hoped by doing so that his team would be there to back him up.

He knew he had trust issues; it had been that way ever since he was young. As a kid he always had trouble making friends. Over time as he secluded himself more frequently, most of the other children stayed away, and in doing so, he did the only thing he could; study. Becoming quite apt at the sciences, he found a love for something, which would never shy away from him, never ridicule him for being different. The more the kids teased and bullied him, the more he applied himself to his studies, thereby building a wall around himself and his emotions. Before too long he'd shied away from his peers so much that he'd lost all the social graces, and niceties and eventually became the total opposite of his sister. The two of them were as different as night and day.

Jeanie had always been a brilliant physicist; at least equal to him. But she had somehow managed to find the perfect balance between being smart _and_ popular and he envied her for it. As his jealousy of her grew, so did their distance, until just recently that is. After a quirk of fate Jeanie had come to Atlantis and they'd been able to repair some of the damage he'd caused to their relationship, but not until there'd been some subtle intervention from Sheppard; and he'd never forget that second chance to start things over with her. He just hoped that he'd get the chance to repay his friend, and maybe today was that day. Working at the SGC and being here in the Pegasus galaxy, he'd learned a lot about trust and friendship. Slowly the walls started to crumble, and he'd learned to trust people other than himself; although he doubted that he'd ever fully be a team player; too many years of being dependant on oneself put paid to that. However, like Ronon, they'd persevered with him, even with his lack of social skills. As a result, he'd learned to depend on them with his life, and now he was putting that trust to the test.

* * *

A piercing scream woke him from his exhaustive state, and for a brief moment he thought that the pitiful pleading was coming from him; it wouldn't be the first time. Sitting up suddenly, the shrill noises coming from somewhere deep within the cavernous enclaves sent a shiver down his spine; he shuddered at the thought of what Kolya and his men were up to. Uncertainty as to whether the commander was trying to replicate his previous methods on other people rocked him to the core. Given his current circumstances he knew there was little he could do, but it didn't negate from the fact that it had to be stopped – Kolya had to be stopped. When he finally spoke, he controlled his voice; belaying any fear that he felt, "What the hell is he doing to them?"

The Wraith looked on pensive, "I do not know. Before our last encounter I was locked away like an animal, and tortured for many years; the fate of others was not my concern."

_I don't care if these are Genii or not, they're still people, and I can't stand by and do nothing. Nobody deserves this. _"Next time Kolya comes to read us a bedtime story, it's all or nothing. Agreed?" Frustrations at being helpless built up inside him like a volcano waiting to erupt.

Rattling the chains to prove his point the Wraith voiced his concerns. "We are chained to a wall, it is unlikely that Kolya would allow us any freedom."

"Okay, that part of the plan is a bit sketchy, I'll give you that. But, if we put our minds to it, I'm sure we'll come up with something. I'm not giving up just yet. Agreed?" He emphasized his last point; they both had to be in agreement.

"Agreed." The Wraith nodded in compliance. And for the first time since their capture, Sheppard heard strength in his gruff voice; at least one thing had gone right today - he had managed to save a life.

Distracted by the noises coming from their vicinity they watched as shadows bounced of the stonewalls, and the familiar sounds of footsteps echoing along the concrete floor halted their conversation in its prime. The Wraith looked across to Sheppard, concern at his friends well being reflected in his eyes. He knew one thing was a certainty, whatever was to come, there was no way Sheppard would be able to survive another session.

Rebelliously, the Wraith came to a standing position as if protecting his comrade, Sheppard in an effort to stand beside his friend as a final act of defiance, but his limbs refused to hold his weight. The Wraith seeing him struggle offered a helping hand so that the two men could stand together, Sheppard grasped his wrist, clutching it as if it was his lifeline and brought himself to a standing position. Although his limbs protested with the concerted effort he watched suspiciously as the guard approached their holding cell. As their eyes honed in on the figure coming into view, they realised it wasn't the guard; it was the lab technician that had injected Sheppard earlier. The prisoners looked on with mistrust. So far the guards had always come with the technicians, but this time it was different.

The tall fawn haired man held an air of fear as he approached the holding cell taking in Sheppard's aged appearance, and gasping slightly at the sight before him. The man he'd been forced to inject was now nothing but a shadow of his former self, as age lines graced his previously youthful face; gray thinning hair had taken the place of his previous color. Watching them warily, the man's eyes shifted from the entrance to them as if fearing being caught talking to them.

Seeing the strangeness in the young man's actions, Sheppard walked closer to the bars only managing to move a few feet, but it was enough to see the depth of fear portrayed in the trembling man. His hostility towards the man was evident, "If you think you're going to get more samples, forget it."

"I came to see…"

Sheppard cut him off mid sentence. "What? Your handiwork?" contempt for the man that helped Kolya dripped from his lips.

"No," the man looked appalled, he shook his head vehemently, "It's not like that at all."

Sheppard crossed his arms in defiance, refusing to let the man see how frail he had become. "Oh really? You could've fooled me. So, your helping Kolya is all an act is it?"

"I've come to help you," the technician told him in earnest.

"I think you've 'helped' enough, don't you?"

"No, you don't understand. I'm a doctor…"

"Well let me tell you something, doc, your bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired. You hear those people screaming before? They may be your people, and…"

He tried to put his point forward, but to no avail. He knew this wasn't going to be easy, he anticipated as much after he left the prisoner the last time. But, after witnessing Kolya's act and hearing the torturous cries of his own people begging for mercy took him over the edge, he couldn't stand by any longer. "They are my people and the reason I'm here."

"So, not content with just a handful of your own people being tortured and killed," Sheppard was just beginning to gather momentum, "You thought, 'what they hell', let's just add a few more casualties to the list. I mean what are a couple more dead bodies, when you've killed so many? Right Doc?"

Reasoning with the man just wasn't working, and given that sound travelled along the corridor, he couldn't risk being discovered with them; he had to take a chance. Opening up the jail cell, he left it open to avoid the clattering of the metal. He moved nearer towards them, and lowering his voice he told them honestly, "Look, you have every right to be angry with me. If I were in your shoes I'd probably feel the same way. But, I didn't know, I swear to you." Sheppard looked on with incredulity, a look of suspicion tore between the colonel and the doctor, but the Doctor was determined that he was going to have his say. "I meant what I said before, about helping you. I had no idea what Kolya's plans were, and I'm sorry for the pain I caused you. What I'm trying to say, if you'll let me, is that I can help you leave this place. But we have to leave now."

"How do I know that this isn't one of Kolya's little mind games?"

"You don't!" The response was succinct, and heartfelt, his hands clenching an unclenching with nervous energy. "I know you don't trust me after what happened…"

"You're damn right I don't."

"Look, Kolya will be back before too long, and nothing will stop him from getting what he desires. Make no mistake colonel, I'm not here for you or the creature that stands beside you." John bit back the urge to tell him the Wraith wasn't some creature; now wasn't the time. As he spoke screams of pain and terror ripped through the caverns, and he shut off his mind to the pain and suffering going on around him. "Hear that? They are the reason I'm here. Without you, there may be a chance that he'll stop experimenting. You have unique properties within your blood, which means that, Kolya needs you _and_ your DNA. Without it, he's flying blind…so to speak."

"If that's the case, then what about the samples you already took from me?"

"I've destroyed them. I can't allow this to continue under any premise."

Aged, bloodied and battered, Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard, who had literally been to hell and back, firmly stood his ground. He hadn't come all this way for it to fall by the wayside. Gauging the man's features, he honestly wasn't sure whether the doctor could be trusted. Ultimately though, even if the man just gave them a fighting chance and released them from their bindings, it would be worth it. They really had nothing to lose by trusting him, "I'm not leaving without finishing what I started."

The Doctor shook his head, not quite understanding why they weren't in a hurry to get out of their confines. His patience was waning, "Which is?"

"Kill Kolya."

The doctor paced, shaking his head, it was suicide. "You can't be serious? Do you have any idea of what you'd be up against?"

_And your point is?_ "Yes."

"It's one thing to help you escape, but it's something else entirely to assist you in tracking down my commanding officer. I won't do it." He was adamant on that point.

"I never asked you to. This is between Kolya and us. All I'm asking is for you to show us the way, nothing more."

"He's with the other prisoners." His tone was heavy as the weight if the weight of his decisions to help them fell heavily on his shoulders. He knew he was doing the right thing, but this could have been avoided earlier, if he had faced up to his responsibilities as a human being. "Bear in mind though, that there are guards patrolling the corridors. You'll need your weapons."

"Don't suppose you have them on you?" Sheppard knew it was a long shot, but he had to ask.

"No."

_Didn't think so. So, no weapon, guards patrolling, Kolya waiting to kill them. Just your average day at the office. Piece of cake. _Who was he kidding?

"There is something else I need to tell you." The man shifted his gaze to the ground. Racked with guilt at what he'd been forced to do, he knew he had to at least try and make amends with the young soldier.

"I don't know if you've noticed or not, but now is not exactly the time for us to sit down and have a little chat."

"It's important."

"I doubt it's as important as stopping, Kolya." Sheppard told him as he went to push past him. He faltered slightly, his limbs protesting with every movement, but he refused to succumb for his bodies need to rest.

The technician grabbed hold of his forearm, steadying him at first. He caught a look of disdain from the man, but continued to restrain him from leaving the cell until he'd told him. "You're going to die." The words came out hurriedly, and it stopped the soldier in his tracks. "That injection I gave you…"

"You're telling me this now?" Shock at the sudden revelation caught him off guard. Irrespective of what the man had just said, he had no intentions of dying, not until he finished what he started.

End of Part XII

AN: Thanks everyone for your reviews :o) I'm so sorry that it's taken so long to post this next chapter… Am I forgiven?


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